Of Foxes and Turtles
by NeonZangetsu
Summary: In search of power, to retrieve his friend. In search of redemption, to redeem their bond. In search of love, to find a place in the world. This is a story of power and untold bonds. Of love and lust. Takes place in the Guren Arc & onward. NarutoxHarem!
1. Of Foxes and Turtles

**A/N: YO! This little ficlet is a result of many many MANY long hours of thinking and hard work! That, and a persistent idea that would NOT leave me be until I put it down on paper. So before our story begins, please, bear with me for a moment. ****The Tailed Beasts were originally one, right? And, (in theory) they will eventually become one once more, right? **

**S****o what would happen if a jiinchuuriki happened to absorb a SECOND tailed beast in addition to the one he already possesed? Oh, sure, he might EXPLODE from the sheer amount of excess chakra, but what if he survived? This story, is a continuation of that idea/plotline. And like the summary said, this takes place exclusively during the Guren arc, so I suggest you watch it in order to understand just what's happens!**

_This is why we can't have nice things!_

_~Unknown_

**Of Foxes and Turtles**

Something was wrong.

Terribly, terribly wrong.

Uzumaki Naruto stared down at the Three Tailed Turtle, eyeing its burning body with fear and trepidation. Had that last jutsu been enough? Had his technique finished it? Was it dead? Warily, he edged his left foot forward. What he found caused his molars to clench in a rare bout of anger. Not only did the burning hulk continue to thrash and flail in and amidst the waters, but now it saw him. It was looking at him. _Right at him. _Its lone eye glinted darkly in the gloom as it leered up at its tormentor, a strange semblance of sentience surfacing behind the milky film of its lid. Despite himself, Naruto swallowed nervously.

Nope. Definitely not dead.

**_"Giiiiiiiiii..._**

The tailed beast tensed, its shoulders clenching against some gargantuan effort. Its three tails lashed the lake beneath it, stirring the currents into a frenzy; extinguishing the flames that besieged its shell. Having doused the fire, the Sanbi was now free to turn its attention towards the meddlesome human who pained it so. Its jaws snapped openly, forming a writhing mass of chakra within. A spiraling orb of chakra gathered before its maw, growing larger with each second. Before long, it utterly eclipsed both the lake as the cliff itself. With a sonorous roar, the blast plowed forward into the cliffside; shearing from the mainland and plunging its occupants into the frigid depths below. Briefly, he had to admire its ingenuity, Naruto did. Deprieve the enemy of the high ground and strike when the field was to your advantage. Which was precisely what the Sanbi had just done. Scarce had Naruto struck the water than he was atop it, struggling to stay aloft despite the waves threatening to throw him from his feet.

_'Since when can that thing think?' _He dodged backwards as another blast of water tore through the patch of mist he'd occupied but a moment before. It tore a swathe of sheer destruction as it coursed past, savaging the cliffside once again before dispersing. Naruto swung around, searching for Gamakichi and his brother amidst the debris. Both were nowhere to be seen. Either they'd returned by choice, or the lack of chakra had forced them to do so. So much for their combination technique.

He felt, rather than saw, the turtle. He took a step back as it broke the surface, looming out the fog like a great and unholy ghost. The thought made him shudder. Damnit, he _hated_ ghosts! He absolutely _hated_ ghosts! But this was no ghost, Naruto told himself as it surged forward. This was a Bijuu. A tailed beast of unparalleled power. Just like that bastard fox sealed in his stomach. Without Gamakichi and Gamatatsu to back him up_-maybe even with them- _it could easily kill him. Just a flick of its barbed tail and that was it. Game over. He stood no chance against it. Not without the Kyuubi's power. Unbidden, a memory came of what he'd nearly done to Sakura. _No!_ He wasn't going to use that power anymore! Absolutely not! Not if it meant harming those most precious to him. Not at all!

_'I'll do this with my own power.'_ He silently avowed. _'Not that damned fox's!'_

And then suddenly it was upon him. The Sanbi loomed out of the fog, cooly regarding him with a lone iris. A low, burbling hiss worked its way out of its throat, but it made no effort to attack, though it could have easily done so. Nor did it move. Instead, it waited, bobbing against the currents as the waves lashed against its shell. It did not strike. It seemed to be...waiting. Watching him. Awaiting his next move. Naruto, despite knowing the effort to be futile, began to channel a rasengan into the center of his palm and...

_...nothing._

The Sanbi, though it doubtlessly recognized the technique that had already done so much damage to its right eye, did not attack. And Naruto couldn't help but wonder why. It had been so aggressive before but now, _now_ the creature was downright placid. It was as if he could reach out and touch it. And he just might have, had it not tried to devour him hours before. No, he was wary of this creature and he had every right to be. And yet...

Something in that eye of sea foam green stayed Naruto's hand. This creature was old. Ancient, even. He understood that this was a tailed beast. Just as he understood that he had to stop it somehow. Fat chance of that! He couldn't stop it, at least, not by himself. But he could see Kakashi-sensei, or any of the others for that matter. Doubtlessly they were here _somewhere. _He just didn't know where, _damnitall!_

And then, abruptly, the Sanbi submerged.

Its massive head dipped below the waves, followed soon thereafter by the rest of its massive bulk, leaving little more than a ripple. It sank like a stone, its flippers proppelling it to the depths below in the span of a heartbeat. And it stayed there. Naruto waited for it remerge; to rear its ugly head as it went on another rampage. When it refused, that was when he started to get nervous. Naruto didn't like this. He didn't like it one bit. He'd much rather have solid ground beneath his toes, rather than the unstable surface the lake offered him.

_'Damnit, where'd he go?'_

He scanned the surface of the water, hoping to find some sign of the foul beast. But the fog prevailed upon him once more, obstructing his vision and dulling his senses to the point of nonexistence. In a moment of weakness, Naruto cursed his own ineptitude. He'd had a chance to finish the Sanbi off_-or at the very least force it to retreat-_and he had let it slip through his fingers like running water. If the damned turtle didn't want to be found, then it wouldn't be found. Unless it wanted to find him.

It ocurred to him that he should probably seek safer ground, lest the Sanbi try and catch him unawares. He knew this. He wanted to do this, and yet he could not. By the time he'd taken his first step in the direction of the shoreline, the water had already begun to boil. Too late, he felt the current stir beneath his chakra-coated feet. Too late, did he notice the sudden shadow hurtling towards him from the murky depths.

He wasn't at all prepared for what came next.

Suddenly, and without warning, the creature surfaced. Perhaps 'surfaced' wasn't right word. More like exploded. The Sanbi lurched out of the lake, taking him with it as it rose out of the water. Deprived of his foothold, Naruto stumbled forward onto the creature's shell. His head spun as it kissed an iron-hard spike. Black spots swam before his vision as he struggled to rise.

_Up, damn you! Get up!_ Swearing and spitting he got on his hands and knees and _tried_ to stand, eyes watering, ears ringing. Pushing his hands against the gravely surface of the shell, he'd made it all of halfway, a half-assed oath leaving his lips before the shadow fell upon him; before he raised his gaze and realized what exactly he was looking at. In his haste to stand, he'd failed to notice the creature's three whip-like tails looming over his head.

Then, in a movement so swift that Naruto would later remark on it as little more than a blur, they struck. Each of those three tails could've easily disembowled him. They did not. Instead, to his dismay they stopped just short of his navel, and one of them lifted the hem of his jacket, exposing his stomach. The other coiled about his legs and bound him fast. And the third remaining tail, jammed against his stomach with enough force to crush a mountain.

Naruto gagged.

It felt as he'd just been stabbed. A flood of memories and images_-primal instinctual emotional-_inundated his senses. The scent of the cean breeze. The taste of briny saltwater upon his lips. A blurred landscape filled with inverted mountains and endless oceans. The sounds of a frantic, hammering heartbeat. All these sights and sounds and more held sway over him for what felt like an eternity. Finally, an overwhelming prescence sliced through the static like a hot knife through butter.

**"Jiinchuuriki."** A rough, fractured and gravelly voice resonated within Naruto's thoughts. Something touched his mind then; a frayed and tattered strand of conciousness that sought something. Perhaps a link with one of its own? Naruto didn't know, and quite frankly, he didn't care. He was too busy trying to swallow yesterday's dinner. And still this alien prescence continued to poke and prod at him, awaiting some measure of response.

Was he supposed to do something? Say something? Naruto didn't quite know how he ought respond. He knew only that his tennant protested _violently_ against the sudden and violent intrusion of its personal space and host. The feeling was entirely mutual. And still, the Sanbi quivered in excitment.

**"Jiinchuuriki!"** Morce forecefully now the genderless tone commanded. There was a strange fascination to be found with its voice; a quaint, primitive excitement. Like a child demanding a toy or a dog gnawing a bone. It almost sounded eager. It pushed one of its tails against the seal, harder now. And then, everything fell away. Suddenly Uzumaki Naruto was no longer standing upon the slippery shell of Sanbi as it held him down. Suddenly he wasn't standing on anything at all. The Sanbi's shell was gone and so too was the creature itself. He was dimly aware of a voice calling to him_-Hinata?-_because suddenly, in addition the Sanbi's sudden dissapearance, _he_ was falling.

**_"JIINCHUURIKI!"_**

Naruto couldn't even bring himself to channel chakra to his legs as he struck the water. Couldn't bring himself to move as he sank beneath the surface. Because he couldn't do anything. He couldn't cry out. Couldn't struggle. Strangely, the lack of oxygen didn't bother him at all. Not in the slightest. What did bother him was the giant manifestation of the Sanbi that loomed before him in his mind.

**"Jinchuuriki."** Softer, more insistently now. **"Jin-chuu-ri-ki." **Was that the only word it knew? It certainly seemed to be fascinated by it. By him. Transparent in origin, that great green chakra lingered between the realms for what felt like an eternity. This monstrous construct of chakra hovered before Naruto's soul for but a moment longer. Then, inexplicably, it dove forward. Uncaring of him, or his tenant, it proceeded to force its chakra upon the unwilling Uzumaki. To claim him as its host.

Despite the claim a certain kitsune had already laid to the blond.

Paper thin, his defenses shattered upon contact with the Three Tails. To Naruto's dismay, he began to blubber and bawl all over again. Writhing, gagging and choking, a liquid and pale substance poured from the Sanbi and its mouth, leaking from his mouth, nose, and even his eyes. Naruto wanted to retch, but his stomach crumpled in on itself and left his throat barren.

His eyes bulged and his body convulsed. Liquid fire coursed through his veins, scouring him clean. He tried to resist, tried to contain the chakra but the forces pulling upon him were simply too much to bear. It felt as if he were being slowly torn in two; as if his still-beating heart were being wrenched from his chest. He did everything he could to fight it, to fight the forces embuing him with its chakra and life-force, and succeeded only in prolonging his own suffering. And so, in the end, Uzumaki Naruto screamed.

He screamed; a strange, wordless scream.

_"Daaaaaaaamniiiiiiiiiiiiiit!"_

Overshadowing that soft whistle, came a _sound_. It was strange, this sound, a reedy thin cry, that echoed on into the distance, as though it were the dying gasp of an ancicent creature. It hung in the air, reverberating around them for what seemed like an eternity, before finally losing its tune and fading sadly into the night. However, another chorus immediately overlapped its final note, filling the void that had been left to it by its short lived predecessor.

The antithesis to its parent, this melody contained the voice of a young woman's. Soft and despairing, vibrant and brimming with boundless desire, emanating boundless grief and sorrow within this, its final melody. Unlike its bretheren, it was easily recognizeable, and distinctly human in origin. 'Twas many things, yet all were one and the same. It was the voice of a young woman, whispering softly to her lover. It was the laughter of a little girl, guilless and kind. It was the cry of an insatiable demon, raw with fury and battle lust. It was the sound of many, _of two,_ and the voice of one. It was joy and sadness, anger and weakness, mistakes made, and yet to be made.

_And it was coming from inside of him._

_"This is strange." _Abruptly, the screaming ended, replaced by a voice like velvet. It spoke to him, resonating from deep within his mind. _"Sanity. I had forgotten what it felt like after all these centuries." _Scarce had it spoken, than blue irises began to flicker. Sapphire gave way to teal then crimson, staining it a sickly red. A teal iris shone in the darkness, regarding him with thinly veiled amusement. White sclera blazed into a fury of scarlet, pulasating with power. Power, raw, incredible power, rose up inside of him like a wave, scouring him clean, restoring the sensation of feeling, of motion, to his limbs. _Strange._ This voice didn't belong to Kyuubi; because Kyuubi sure as hell didn't have a woman's voice. What the hell was this? What the hell was going on here?

**"AAAARGH!"** A feral snarl riocheted around in the genin's skull. **"What devilry is this! Who let _you_ in here, Kamehime!" **A peal of mirthful laughter bounded off the walls of Naruto's skull, subsuquently deafening him.

_"I believe I let myself in, Kurama." _Came the bemused reply._ "Ah, but you've no idea how wonderful it is to be able to think again! I can use my mind! I can communicate! As much as I want! As long as I want! No more one-word sentences for me! No sir! I can even take my human form again! Hallejulliah! How has it been since I've done that, eh, Kurama? Seriously though, do you you have any idea how long its been? I can't remember. Seriously._

**"Not long enough, if you ask me." **The fox grumbled.** "And did you _have_ to tell him my true name, you stupid turtle?"** Naruto for the most part, gawped. He hadn't even considered the possibility. The Kyuubi actually had a name? Did all the tailed beasts have one? Each of them? And why on earth could he hear the Sanbi in his head now when he hadn't been able to before. Wait a second. The Sanbi. In. His. Head. Talking to him. Right now. That could only mean...mean...mean._...!_

**"WHAT THE FUCKING HELL?"**

Sanbi cackled mirthlessly.

_"Oh dear, it seems he's finally succumbed to the shock." _A dry chortle, followed by the sensation of fingertips across his face._ "Uzumakis' truly are resilient, after all. Such a healthy amount of stamina, too..."_

**"Says the host stealing wench!"**

Naruto had just enough time to wonder this before he went under.

_"Great...now I have **TWO** voices in my head..._

**_A/N: ENJOY! What can I say, the idea came to me! Naruto now has the powers of the Sanbi in addition to the Kyuubi! Well, technically the two are now one in the same, but I can proudly say that with the Three Tailed Turtle now within him he'll have some...unusual abilities. So what do you think? I know that the summary said harem, but should it be a harem? And if so who should be in it? I want this to be unique, after all! And yes, Sanbi is STRONGLY hinted to be of the opposite gender in this ficlet, that is to say, female. She, at the very least, shall be part of the harem! Now if only they would give out the rest of them..._**

**_Still, having two, crazy demons in his head, one of whom wants him and the other whom may (or may not) be female should definitely be interesting for our dear shinobi. Remember, this is all an idea in theory! Until then folks, Ja ne!_**

**_Note: Kamehime= Turtle Princess, an amusing interpretation I and several others came up with for the Sanbi's true name. No worries though. She'd mostly be going by Sanbi though. Also, BLEH on you, Tobi! Let's see you try and get the Three Tails now! That ought to throw a wrench in your evil schemes! Gee, I wonder how his training will turn out now that the Kyuubi and Sanbi are sort of one...XD B_**

**_Be sure and vote and Pm and tell what you think as well as any ideas! Love you all and thank you for your continued support!_**

**_~Nz_**

**_P.S:_**

**_R&R! =D_**


	2. Of Lotus and Turtles

**A/N: I'm so glad that all of you like this story! And for those of you who wondering, yes, Sanbi-sama is part of the harem! I'm roping in Guren as well! Did u SEE how well she was getting along with Naruto before Kabuto came and fucked things up! Which reminds me...he is seriously wack. As for the rest of the potential harem candidates, be sure to leave a vote in your review =D And on a side note, we apparently now know the Sanbi's REAL name, alongside the other Biju! So enjoy the chapter! Because its a long one! **

"_When a friend is in trouble, don't annoy him by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it._"

_~Unknown_

**Of Lotus and Turtles**

His consciousness flickered like a tiny flame amidst wave tossed tides. Awash in a sea of pain he struggled back to the surface, labhoring for breath amidst an ocean of memories not entirely his own. He could feel his chakra; hoplessly mired within another's. And another's. Three sources of chakra, one of which was his own. The other two were foreign to him, one of which he recognized, the other, he did not. One of which he hadn't used, the other of which he dared not. He tried to concentrate tried to drive the sleep from his limbs and only succeeded in miring himself further.

He gathered the power into himself, focused it, harnessed it, channeled it...

"Naruto!"

Naruto felt himself being roughly dragged from the haze of pain in which he lingered. Someone was shaking him by the shoulders. He wanted to cry out, tell them to stop. _For the love of Kami, you're hurting me!_ All he could do, however, was weakly groan.

"Naruto! You have to get up!"

The voice was Sakura's. It felt so far away...like he was looking down at himself lying there in the darkness, but none of this had any relation to _him._ It wasn't real. Just some dream he couldn't quite wake from. He felt his conciousness returning, albeit reluctantly. Like an unruly child roused from its slumber, his world slowly came back to him.

"Naruto!"

He reluctantly opened his eyes. The reality that greeted him was a sharp and unrelenting knot of agony that burned in his stomach and spread its tendrils into the rest of his body. He wanted to retreat from it, back into the darkness, but the insistent shaking wouldn't let him.

"Sakura-chan," He mumbled, "I'm awake."

Sakura looked relieved. Teary-eyed, the pinkette embraced him, sending a fresh wave of agony coursing through his flesh. _Of course._ The one time Sakura-chan hugged him, the one time she actually showed any real concern for him, and it had to hurt! Naruto would have sulked, had it not felt like his flesh was aflame. She began sobbing, and as Naruto slowly came back to his senses he realized something was wrong. There was shouting outside. Tree crashing and people running. Voices filled with urgency. Off in the distance an explosion sounded.

That made him sit up. Were they under attack? Where was the enemy? Where was the Sanbi, for that matter? Was it dead?

_"I am quite alive, thank you very much."_

Naruto froze.

"Naruto?" Sakura looked concerned. "Naruto? What's...

His pupils dialated and the world fell away.

* * *

><p><em>(Naruto's Mind)<em>

He opened his eyes and gasped.

Everything had gone white. Like winter it hung over him, blanketing his existence. He lay there for a moment, struggling to take it all in. The infinite white seemed to stretch on endlessly, leaving nothing but the void in its wake. It was disconcerting. Overwhelming. For a scarce second he feared that the silence might swallow him whole. Then he sat up and realized he was no longer alone. A shadow had fallen over him, and as it grew, so too did the sound of footsteps.

_"Konichiwa."_ A voice like liquid greeted him from beyond the abyss. "Uzumaki Naruto." He rounded on the sound, and was alarmed to find a young woman_-a woman!-_sitting across from him; kneeling in servility as his eyes focused upon her. Naruto tried to find the words, but they refused to come. All that emerged was a small croaking sound a silent whisper that did little to stir the silence between them.

For the first time in his life, Uzumaki Naruto was truly, utterly, speechless.

He took in the large eyes, perfectly coifed hair, clear skin, full lips, and lean, firm curves and he marveled at her. Hers was a beauty beyond describing, but, ultimately, it was the eyes that ensnared him him. The _eye_ actually. Her right eye remained hidden, framed behind a of curtain of silver and scarlet locks. Beyond that, white bandages wrapped around the length of her face, obscuring most of her forehead from view. Her _left eye_ was what held him. That cool, pool of deep, verdant green, so unlike his own. Hers were eyes that knew true loneliness. Loneliness and pain. A pain so deep that it threatened to tear the woman to pieces; as loneliness that threatened to swallow her whole and let her happiness bleed away between her fingers. But at some point that pain had been taken to pieces; had been dissected, dissasembled, examined from every angle and then summarily conquered.

Despite all the majesty her eyes held, keeping his gaze focused upon her _face_ was quickly proving to be a trial all itsown; thanks in part to her attire. She wore a simple kimono bound by a simple indigo obi. That said kimono just so happened to be open at the chest, revealing the glorious sight within, was proving. Naruto felt his cheeks inexplicably darken as a result. Then he chastised himself with a shake of the head. He was a shinobi for crissakes! So why couldn't he stop staring at a pair of...of...of...

_"M-My eyes are up here, if you don't mind."_

Her voice_-like liquid-_gently tugged him from his reverie.

"Sorry."

The woman shook her head.

_"You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about."_ She paused, frustration flitting across the slender feature that were her face. _"If anyone is to be sorry, it is I, for my unlawful intrustion."_ She squirmed a beneath his inquisitive stare. "_I...should not have done this. It goes against everything my kind stands for. You have to understand, it has been so **long** since I've had a host; since my mind was my own..._

She slowed then, apparently at a loss for words.

_"You must hate me, after all the trouble I've caused you."_

She had a gentle look about her and it was then, in that instant, that he realized the identity of this buxom beauty. Only one eye. This eerie chakra, so assimilar to that of the Kyuubi's. The three tails of plated armour emerging subtly from her backside. She couldn't possibly be...but she was. The woman arched a slender eyebrow in response to the unspoke question, her scarlet and silver hair eclipsing her visage for the upteenth time.

"You're the Sanbi." He let the statement hang unadorned between them. Odd, that he should feel so calm, when in the prescence of such a creature. There was no gate to bar her from him; there was no seal to restrain her, unlike_-it felt so strange calling him this-_Kurama. She could strike at any time she wished. Instead, she smiled. It was a sad, lonely little thing, that smile.

"My true name is Isobu." The woman corrected. "But even though you surely hate me, I will allow you to address my by my preferred title: Kamehime."

"But I don't hate you." Naruto continued.

The silver-haired woman _smiled_ at that, her head lilting to the side ever so slightly. She touched a hand to her breast, supple fingertips gliding across smooth skin. He couldn't help but notice the manicured tips of her nails. Odd, that he should notice that, of all things. It was then he saw the tears. They fell from her eyes one by one, marked only by the faint sheen upon her cheeks; the stain against her bandage. His heart ached at the sight. He scooted forward on his knees, desperate to make it stop yet not knowing how he could. Somehow, her head found the point of his shoulder. Naruto stiffened, but made no move to push her away when his newest tenant began to speak.

"Of course you don't." She whispered, scrubbing at her eyes with the back of a hand. "You never _could_ hate anyone, could you?" She shook her head, denying him any chance to answer. "Even your enemies; even I, who have caused you such durress. Such misfortune...

"You keep saying that." Naruto said suddenly. "Such misfortune. What do you mean by that?"

Incredibly, the woman _flushed._

...we are bonded now, you and I." She mumbled, unable to meet his gaze. "I, Kamehime, am a part of you now, as much as Kurama is." Now, Naruto wasn't stupid. Dense he might be, but not stupid. It didn't take long for him to connect the dots. The searing pain in his stomach. Every breath was agony. She was a part of him. Just like Kyuubi. She was a part of him. A part of him! Oh, kami! He had another bijuu in his stomach! His vision blurred and he felt like he was going to faint.

"Please don't be alarmed!" Kamehime pleaded, her tone rising, as if she were aware of her host's distress. "I didn't mean for this to happen! My chakra is yours, I swear it! I'm yours, body and soul! You have but to ask and my power is yours! Any of it! All of it!"

Naruto could scarcely believe his ears.

_"Eh?"_

Wasn't a bijuu supposed to be more...malevolent than this? Kurama was basically a massive lump of hatred. And Gaara's Shukaku hadn't exactly been the most _sane_ of Tailed Beasts during their battle. The Sanbi wasn't at all like that. If anything, she seemed fearful. Fearful of upsetting him, perhaps? Of losing him? Or was it just her sanity that she so desperately wanted to preserve? That _was_ why she'd forced her way in here after all...

Naruto stared at her dubiously.

"Is there...something on my face?" she asked.

"No...its nothing." Naruto stammered.

"Then you're not angry?

"I guess not."

"Thank goodness!"

Naruto blushed as the bijuu lowered his hand and squeezed his fingers. She leaned toward him and murmurred into his ear, "Thank you." He squeezed her hand in return. "Of all the master's I've ever had, you are by far, the most benevolent." The thought brought blood to his cheeks. _Master?_ Why was he suddenly picturing her in a maid outift? He actually wouldn't mind that image_...stop!_ Naruto slapped his cheeks rapidly, banishing the errant thought to the darkest corners of his mind.

He _seriously_ doubted the fox was enjoying this as much as he was.

"So...who was your master before me?" Naruto inquired, desperately seeking a change of conversation. Kamehime fidgeted under this sudden line of questioning however and he couldn't help but wonder if he'd broached the wrong subject with her. He knew virtually nothing of the Sanbi, save that it-she-was the third weakest of the Nine. Apparently she also held domain over the element of water and could induce hallucinations in her foes at the slightest inclination.

"His name was Yagura." Kamehime answered at length. "You might have known him as the Fourth Mizukage."

Naruto nearly fell ass backwards, such was his surprise.

"You...were sealed inside the Fourth Mizukage?"

Her gaze darkened.

"Yes, and he was the most wicked and easily manipulated man to ever live." She held up a hand to forestall further arguement. "But that is neither here nor there. I have only one question to ask of you, Uzumaki Naruto; only one demand that I must make."

"And that is?"

"Will you promise to take care of me?" Kamehime asked softly, peering up at him with her overlarge eyes. "Will you promise never to hurt me?" Briefly, Naruto flashed back to what he had already done: he'd blinded her. Burned her. Granted, he hadn't known the outcome of his attacks then_-he'd been trying to protect Yukimaru-_but he was stillll held accountable for his actions. He hadn't _wanted_ to hurt the Sanbi; he just hadn't known that she was really...like this.

_ 'Not that I mind being with her, I mean she has a great figure and those soft-GAH! I've been spending too much time around Ero-sennin, I'm starting to think like him!'_ His thoughts were interrupted by a soft tug on his sleeve, looking down he spotted an earnest looking Sanbi.

"Will you," she asked, softer this time, "Protect me?"

"I-I will."

_"Will_ you?" she replied in a voice of sudden steel. Turning towards him, she pinioned him on her gaze. "Then you will be bonded to me." She lifted her hand as if in blessing, but then reached out to lay her palm on his forehead and lace her fingers through his hair. Power poured through her touch. It roared into Naruto. The Sanbi's mind entered his own like a thief through a window. But he welcomed this thief. He took her hand and led her deep within and showed her vistas of memory. And she him.

They ran together at the height of the defaced Stone Faces as the Anbu chased them.

They swam together through the depths of an underground river.

They fought side by side during the invasion of Konoha.

They stood hand in hand on the precipiece of a cliff, overlooking an endless ocean.

Naruto showed her every moment: when he was a boy clapping his hands red as Tsunade was inducted as Godaime Hokage; when he was first blooded, a young man chasing after Sasuke in Orochimaru's hideout; when he used the Rasenshuriken for the very first time against Kakuzu; when he was most proud, knowing that he'd taken another step toward his dream of becoming Hokage...

Kamehime's hand broke from his forehead, and she lurched back, catching a slight breath. Once again the two of them were sitting in the endless white, staring wide-eyed at each other. The silence was deafening.

Kamehime whispered,

"The things you have done."

Naruto grinned.

"Just wait till I become Hokage."

Kamehime glanced toward him and drew a deep breath, becoming herself once again.

"You are bonded to me now, Uzumaki Naruto," she pronounced, speaking to him. "This is a trust I do not readily give."

"Well, I'm glad you gave it to me."

Kamehime stared hard at him for a moment. Then she laughed. She _never_ laughed. The sound was strange like bells ringing-rare and pure-and it left him gaping. She glanced at him, stopped laughing, and smiled. It was a shy, tentative thing, that smile. She squeezed his hand, her fingertips melding flawlessly within his own. She leaned forawrd, as softly as she could and pressed her forehead to his own. Her eye held him, that riveting orb of sea-foam green so much alike his teammate.

"I'm glad, too." She whispered tenderly.

Naruto started to formulate a response when Kamehime leaned in and kissed him. He was taken completely by surprise, and grabbed her by the shoulders to push her back-perhaps more forecefully than he intended. She trembled, a small sob escaping her lips. Was she crying?

"What...what are you doing?" Naruto asked, at a loss for words.

"I don't want to lose you." She _was_ crying. Now that the tears were coming, they came forcefully, her entire face twisted in grief. "I've only just met you and I don't want to lose you like the others." He tried to console her but she turned away from him, embarassed by her tears. "You're unlike any other master I've had. You're not like the them; because you're _kind._ You're kind and calm and gentle and warm and caring and I...I..._I..._

"Hey...

"I won't lose you to them." Suddenly she became fierce, her single eye glinting like balefire. "No. I won't let them take you away from me. But they're coming. They'll be here soon. They'll take me away from you. _No._ I don't want that. I won't let that happen." Who was she talking about? The Akatsuki? That had to be it. The Akatsuki a rogue group of shinobi hellbent on capturing the bijuu for some sinister purpose_-as they'd with Gaara's-_would undoubtedly come for him soon. And Kamehime was weeping, not out of fear for herself, but _for_ him.

He couldn't remember the last time someone shed tears for him. In _front_ of him, maybe, but never for him. Never for him. To think that Kamehime, a stranger, a bijuu, a new and foreign prescence in his mind, would actually shed tears on his behalf. He didn't know how to deal with this. He thought on it for some time before he finally came up with a solution, an answer that benefited both sides.

"Oi...Kamehime-san...

A sursurus of whispers and she dissolved into sobs once more.

"Arigatou."

Kamehime whipped around, glaring at him incredulously.

_"Nani?"_

Naruto just blinked at her before grinning widely, which strangely caused him to resemble a fox.

"I think I understand you a little better now." He leaned back and made a pinching motion with his fingers. "Jut a _little_ bit. But I'd like to learn more."

The Sanbi actually laughed at that. Laughed, as if she found him to be incredibly funny. It was a strange, nervous laugh; punctuated by hiccups and sobs, the latter dying off as she held her sides and dabbed at her eyes.

"Huhuhu...I'd like to learn more about you, too, Naruto-sama." Naruto felt his cheeks darken under the weight of her words. Before he could protest she kissed im again, only to dance away from him before he could grab her sleeve. Argh! That was the _second_ time she'd done it! Why did she have to keep kissing him! Not that he minded_...but still!_ He only loved Sakura-chan! Right? Naruto was beginning to have his doubts. The first kiss had been startling. The second...well, he'd actually liked it. The thought wasn't as mortifying as he'd thought it would be, though the thought of kissing her again mollified that.

"Say...why aren't you in a cage?" he ventured, noticing the lack of shackles or walls of any sort. Come to think of it he hadn't seen anything after arriving here. Wherever here was.

"Would you rather I be in chains, master?" Kamehime asked, staring at him with her large eye. "I can do so if you wish." Naruto felt a trickle of blood coursing down his nose and ruthlessly suppressed it. This woman...she wasn't actually suggesting...

_Stop!_

Naruto swiftly clamped a hand over his face.

_Stop stop stop STOP! Why am I thinking about that! _He shook his head rapidly._ Damnit, Ero-senin! I'll have your head once I finish this mission!_

_"Is something wrong, Naruto-sama?" _asked Kamehime.

"N-Not at all!" Naruto sputtered. "I was just wondering...you don't have a seal, do you?"

"Of course not," Kamehime giggled. "I entered your body through my own free will. As such I am incapable of harming you, and therefore need no seal in which to contain my chakras." She performed a little twirl, the tresses of her hair flaring wildly about, tickling the tip of his nose. "You'll find that I'm much more capable than my dear Onii-sama." Abruptly, her cheeks reddened. "Oh dear. I shouldn't have said anything about that."

Naruto blinked.

"Onii-sama?"

If it was at all possible, Kamehime's cheeks darkened further.

"I'm the third youngest of the biju, technically speaking." Tentatively, she tented her fingers. "But Son-sama says I'm quite mature for my age!"_ That_ threw Naruto for a loop. If Kamehime was only the third, he couldn't even _begin_ to imagine what the others must be like. Well, he already knew what Kurama was like, so...

Abruptly, Kamehime stiffened.

"What is it?" Naruto asked.

"It seems I've kept you overlong." She pouted. "You'll have to return now. And I was so enjoying your company...

"We can always talk." The words escaped his lips before he could take them back. Truth be told, he didn't want to take them back. His conversation with Kamehime brought a new light to bear upon her and her kind. He still wasn't sure if he trusted Kurama, but in his short time with the Sanbi _her_ worlds had held truth. Looking at her now, he found it hard to believe that they'd ever been enemies. Hell, she'd tried to eat him a few hours ago! And yet despite all the trouble she had caused him, Naruto couldn't bring himself to hate her. This kind, gentle girl was so different from the massive monstrosity that had given him and Guren such a hard time.

"I'd...like that."

Naruto braced himself for another kiss, but it never came. Instead, he felt her arms fold around him in an embrace, wrapping him in a blanket of warmth; banishing the ache from his bones. Today was a day of firsts for him, indeed. She'd wept for him, embraced him, and kissed him, all in the span of a few hours. He placed his chin atop her head, contenting himself another first, as his arms closed around her waist. He did nothing more than that. Just a simple, gentle embrace between jinchuuriki and biju. Idly, he held the notion in his head; were all biju like this? Did they each have some humanoid form, or was Kamehime simply the exception to the rule? Before he knew it, it was over. The landscape began to meld and blur between them, the colors falling apart like a soggy waterpainting.

The turtle princess smiled softly as her world fadded to nothingness.

_"Now, you must return."_

* * *

><p><em>(Back to Reality)<em>

...happening to you?" Sakura finished, her words come out in a rush. Naruto blinked, realizing only a few seconds had passed while they'd spoken. It felt like hours inside his head. How long had he been lying there? How long had she been speaking to him, untoward?

"Wait, what's going on?" he asked, propping himself up on his elbows. Everyone was gathered around him. Everyone except Hinata. The Hyuuga was gazing at the lake, eyes wide as saucers and trembling like a child. He could see veins pulsating against the sides of her face like live wires, pumping chakra into her vision. The Byakugan. Whatever she saw down there in the depths clearly left her terrified; because she jerked backward as if she'd been burned.

When she saw him her fear lessened, if only slightly.

"Na-Naruto-kun...

"Hinata, what do you see?" Sakura asked, noting the Hyuuga's distress. The heiress opened her mouth to reply...and snapped it shut when Naruto bolted to his feet. What the hell _was_ that out there? He may not have the Byakugan, but even he could tell that something was amiss in the lake. The waters spat and hissed like a creature come alive, a veritable cauldron of flame, hurling wave after wave against the shorline. The Sanbi was within him, wasn't she? Then what was causing this disturbance?

_"It must be Kyuubi's chakra."_ Kamehime whispered somewhere inside his mind. _"Apparently our merger hasn't gone over as smoothly as I'd hoped."_

Indeed, it hadn't.

Lightning split the sky into a thousand pieces. Thunder boomed. Far below, and all around, the sea raged. The rain and wind scoured him clean. He opened his mouth and felt moisture on his tongue for the first time in what felt like a century. After so long in the pit, it tasted like freedom itself. He swallowed, gulping down the water; lapping up that sweet and bitter H20 as a massive wave clapped him across his body and left him deafened.

Naruto perched a hand over his eyes and saw it-a hundred yards beyond the shore, a black malestrom. A wide, roaring pit in the choppy seas, and water rushed down into some black abyss. The heart of the whirpool was black, but in the swirling waters, Naruto glimpsed shadowy figures. An emaciated arm, just for a moment, and then what seemed a knoby spine, and then a skull draped in ratty hair or seaweed or something. These shapes were distinct for only a moment, pressing against the spinning membrane before vanishing again.

What the hell?

**"This is your fault, kit."** Kurama's voice clanged hollowly inside his heart. **"Did you really think I'd let you go that easily?"** A sinister cackle. **"Think again! Now you'll see what happens when you side with my sister! When you defy me!" **Furiously, Naruto quashed the voice in his head and stormed toward the lake. Damned fox! Was he so fickle to deny him this? Wasn't he allowed to be happy? Just once? Apparently not. The words of the Nine-Tails had tained whatever joy he had felt at having Kamehime as his partner. Now, he was left to contend with the mess his unruly tenant had left him.

_'Kurama-sama is a mass of malevolence.'_ Isobu offered tersely._ 'The outpouring of chakra here has stirred the restless spirits that linger here. In short, the chakra that leaked through the seal is stirring the souls of the dead. If something isn't done soon to put them to rest, they'll wander the earth forever.'_

And Naruto was to blame for it.

He could _feel_ the void the Sanbi had left behind. Like a wound beginning to fester. It ripped and tore at him, spewing rain and hail and sleet. The Sanbi's abscence had stirred some ungodly prescence within the lake. Something foul. Something unholy. Something beginning to rise. The void that Sanbi left behind was welling up. Brimming with sheer power and overwhemling might, it started to surface. And with it, came a stench powerful enough to kill a elephant. An overpowering stink that left his eyes watering and sent his nose running for the hills.

Suddenly, his strength left him. His knees buckled beneath him; breaking like twigs. He toppled forward into the mud, his forehead kissing an iron root. Black spots speckled before his vision and blotted out everything else. He tried to breathe, but no air came. He was fairly certain that he'd broken several ribs. Maybe even punctured a lung. How he was still moving was beyond him.

_Up, damn you! Get up!_ Gasping and groaning he got on his hands and knees and _tried_ to stand, eyes watering, ears ringing. Pushing his hands against the muddy and murky soil, he'd made it all of halfway, a snarl leaving his lips before he began to tremble; before he raised his gaze and realized the hopelessness of his cause. He was fresh out of chakra. And even if he wasn't, what could he do? The Kyuubi was raising the dead. That wasn't the kind of thing you could stop without some higher power of your own. His hands shook as he struggled to dredge up the last of his strength, struggled to stand. His fingers tore harmlessly at the dirt, digging deep furrows into the earth. He couldn't let this stand. He couldn't let the damned fox do whatever it was doing.

_'I have to do something.'_

For a dreadful moment, there was silence. He nearly despaired. And then he felt it.

_"Then do something."_

Naruto stood woodenly, not taking enough care where to plant his feet. He shrugged off the hands of his friends_-of Hinata and Sakura-_resolutely marching toward his doom. A wave of calm crested across, him wiping away his fear and anxiety. He felt his bones setting themselves, the broken and swollen features of his face slowly sealing themselves into normalcy.

_Slowly,_ Naruto walked out onto the lake. He breasted through grey waves beneath a gray sky. Each step brought him closer to the roiling vortex; every stride took him toward and deeper into the malestrom. He heard Sakura's cries at his back and ignored them. He could feel it; the power thruming within him. Begging for release. He could no _would _calm these waters; because the alternative was unacceptable.

He had only to will it, and it would be done. And so Naruto did just that.

_He willed it._

Naruto raised his arms and let the power of Kamehime, of the Three Tailed Turtle, flow through him. He felt his skin smolder away as his bones shattered and reformed; giving away to sheer chakra and undiluted power. He felt his left eye slither shut and his shoulder stiffen as three tails of plated armor wound their way into existence. He braced himself, but even then he wasn't prepared for the shell to manifest upon his back, bearing down on him like a great and heavy weight.

_"I give you my power, freely."_ Kamehime whispered in his ear. _"I give you myself, freely."_

He wasn't quite sure how he looked, but it must have been terrifying for the others. He could feel the fear of his comrades, as tangible as tears, as palpable as flesh. And yet when he looked down upon himself, he saw that he was still himself. Well, almost. Barring the aforementioned aspects of his transformation, his entire body was coated in a shroud of strange silver and scarlet. He looked human. He _was_ human. He could steel feel his hitiate, biting into the bruised flesh of his forehead. A broken finger; a sprained ankle, his arms his legs, everything was still very much his own. And the chakra_...oh, the chakra!_

It was electrifying.

The wave of force that expanded from him sent every undead creature flying back, as if they weighed nothing. The entire lake shook, and for a single moment Naruto felt exhilarated. The power...it was like nothing he had ever tapped into before. It flowed into his veins, filling him up. It would have been so easy to do more. His will was fragile and he could sense the Kyuubi, lurking just beyond and eager to enter this world. A single call would give him all the power he needed. He could easily bring Sasuke back with this power, one last hurrah that the world would never forget.

Forbidden power at his fingertips, beckoning.

_No!_

With a shout of exquisite agony, Naruto pulled back from the brink. He turned on the malestrom, eyes flashing with power. He straightened, standing tall and proud and true. He turned his attention toward the lake and brought his hands together. He forced his will upon the waves; bending them and the creatures beneath to his will. He bid each of them be still, ushering calm upon the group as a whole. They resisted, at first. Hot pain flashed through Naruto. He pushed past it. He commanded them, demanded that they show subservience; that they become silent once more.

They obeyed.

Just like that, the waters calmed. The frothing surface of the lake became placid as the sun broke through the clouds. It burned through the fog and cast its rays upon the jinchuuriki, enveloping him in light. Naruto sighed and tilted his head back, basking in their warmth. The Three-Tails chakra mode smoldered from his shoulders, the mighty shroud of silver and scarlet_-remember those are the colors of the sanbi-_dissipating with the fog, leaving him alone amidst the lake.

_That was incredible._ He raised his hands and gazed at them, amazed to find they were no longer glowing. _This chakra...I've never felt anything like it. _There was still power to be found within but it lay dormant now, exhausted by his exertions. The pain in his stomach reduced to a dull ache. He felt the ire of the Kyuubi and the unmistakeable joy of the Sanbi, mingling with his own elation.

_"That was wonderful, master!"_ Naruto barely even felt it when a pair of damp and misty arms draped around his neck. _"You used my chakra so flawlessly!" _She was practically giddy with glee. _"You made the very marrow in my bones quiver!"_ Wait a second. Wait one fucking second! Naruto gawped, his jaw falling slack as he realized that he _did_ feel her arms around him. Along with the rest of her. The Sanbi was spooned against him; her breast squishing up against his chest, her face nuzzling into his neck. Normally, this would not have beena problem, other than it flustered him. But it was. Because he could see her. And so could everyone else!

"I-Isobu?" Naruto hissed amidst cries of alarm and confusion. "What the hell are you doing here?" He stole a glance over his shoulder and his worst fears were

"I told you, call me _Kamehime!"_ She didn't stop cuddling with him. "Isobu is such a bland name! I don't like it! Besides, you said we could talk later, right? Well, its _later_ now, isn't it?" Naruto was at a loss for words. He didn't know how to explain this. What in blazes was the Sanbi doing here, outside of him? Granted, she wasn't exactly sealed with the Kyuubi, but still! This shouldn't be possible! She shouldn't be able to come and go as she pleased! How was he going to explain this! Sure enough Naruto felt a small spike of killer intent at his back, coming from Sakura, and, stranger still, Hinata. The male shinobi_-especially Kakashi-_were too dumbfounded to say much of anything. Naruto knew he had less than a second to explain himself or his teammate would be doling out pain in spades.

"That's not the problem here!" He spoke swiftly, glaring daggers at Kamehime. "How did you get here!"

"Silly master, I don't have a seal, remember?" Sanbi grinned, a gorgeous streak of white in the afternoon. "I can come and go as I please."

Naruto groaned.

"Oh, that's just great!" Conversing with her in the seal was one thing. Being able to manifest herself at will was another matter entirely! Baa-chan was going to kill him! She'd kill him dead! And that was _after_ Sakura-chan flayed him alive!

And then, as if matters weren't already catastrophic, Kamehime sniffled.

"D-Does Naruto-sama...not want to see me?" She asked. "Did I upset you, master?"

_"Argh!"_

"Naruto," Sakura began, cracking her knuckles. "Who is that?" Her eyes remained fixed upon this strange girl cuddling with her teammate, and the latter's lack of effort to try and stop said cuddling. She clenched her fist and raised it to give her former teammate a good thumping. Naruto now had less than a _second_ to explain himself, but much to his dismay he could only sputter in weak protestation.

"Um...well...you see, Sakura-chan...

_"You pervert!"_

Past experience kicking in, Naruto quickly flinched in preparation for the strike that he knew was coming. It never struck though.

The blond opened his eyes slowly, to see that Kamehime had easily caught Sakura's arm by the wrist. The pinkette just stared at the silver-haired girl in shock. In one motion, the Sanbi quickly pulled the younger girl close to her, so that they were face to face. The killer intent the bijju was exuding was enough to keep Sakura silent. "I'm only going to say this once: Don't. Hit. My. Master. Is that, in any way, unclear?"

Sakura nodded weakly. Something told her she'd be wise not to anger this woman. While it irked her_-why did it irk her?-_that she seemed so affectionate toward her teammate her sense of preservation overrode any instinct to strike him for his supposed wrongdoing.

"Good", Kamehime released the girl, which caused Sakura to lose her balance and go stumbling to the water's edge, and grabbed onto a stunned Naruto's arm and proceeded to pull him toward the shoreline. Toward Kakashi-sensei. Kami, how was he going to explain this to him? Oh hey, sensei, this here's Kamehime! She's sealed herself inside of me and calls me her master! Why? Because she's the Sanbi!

His legs began to wobble.

_I...I can't do this..._

Thankfully, the blessed blackness chose that moment to reach up and claim him.

* * *

><p><em>(Several Days later)<em>

Kakashi didn't know what to make of it. Nor did Yamato. Neither for that matter, did Shizune. Their mission had been to seal the Sanbi. To prevent Orochimaru or the Akatsuki from getting a hand on it. And it had been sealed. Into Naruto. Where once his body harbored two sources of chakra, it now housed three. Additionally a variation of the Eight Trigrams Seal had formed atop the Yondaime's seal. Evenly layered as the first, it intersected with the Kyuubi's chakra and overlaid it with its own. In short, he could draw on this source of chakra in addition to the Kyuubi's. It was intriguing, to say the least.

Even more intriguing was the fact that his newest tenant seemed to have a mind of her own. She'd been the one to explain the situation once Naruto had collapsed from sheer exhaustion. She'd told them who she was, without the slightest glimmer of hesitation. And when Kiba made the mistaking of doubting her? She transformed, right before their very eyes, trumping whatever arguement anyone on the sealing team might have made and scaring the living daylights out of the lot of them.

It was difficult to argue with a three thousand ton turtle. Thankfully she assumed human form most of the time, making her rather inconspicuous. Apparently most of her kind held this transforming, though few exercised it and even fewer desired it. Apparently she and her sisters were the few who chose it. But what concerned the three Jonin most was the girl's ability to simply appear. She came and went as she pleased, often popping up at the most inopportune of times, only to return to the seal when least expected.

There was no precedent for this.

It had never happened before. _Never_ had a Tailed-Beast addopted a human guise and openly introduced herself to humans. According to the Sanbi, she was breaking all sorts of rules just by speaking with them. Her kind held no government, and as such, had no ruler, save the great Rikudo Sennin a.k.a the Six Path Sage who'd created them nearly a millenia before as halves of the original Ten-Tailed Beast; the Jyuubi.

That was news to Konoha.

The world had long since accepted that the bijuu were little more than chakra given form. Creatures of mass destruction, incapable of feeling, let alone love. And, as the Sanbi had so boldy told them, she loved Naruto. That she was only one tenth of an even greater creature was a little unsettling. Not to mention the purported feelings she held for a certain blond genin and the conflict_-unbeknownst to Naruto-_that those feelings brought with a certain Hyuuga.

Ultimately, Kakashi feared for _Naruto_ the most.

Basically, Naruto was the first Jinchuuriki to have _two_ Tailed Beasts sealed within him. If he wasn't a prime target for the Akatsuki before, then he certainly was now. Not only did he have to contend with the Kyuubi's constant attempts to dominate his mind but then there was the matter of his second tenant's advances. And then there was the new matter of his chakra. With the power of the Kyuubi and the Sanbi, his strength had increased beyond measure, making him more unstable than ever. Jiraiya-sama would have to re-train the boy to control the Sanbi's chakra once they'd returned. And then there was the matter of his mental stability...

Recently, Naruto had become prone to moments of inane dementia. He'd be perfectly fine one minute; the next, he'd space out for hours on end. Sometimes it sounded like his student was talking to someone. Kakashi chalked that up as the boy conversing with his new tenant. His student seemed to be holding up well under the strain, all things considered. That he hadn't exploded yet was a good sign, too.

Yamato looked like he just might, though.

"Senpai!"

Kakashi creaked an eye open from his cot. It was evening now, and tomorrow the group would set out for Fire Country. They'd briefed Tsunade-sama of their unique situation and thus, she considered their mission a bittersweet success. They'd negated the threat of the Sanbi, but had failed to find Orochimaru's hideout. Replacements would be sent out to monitor the situation upon their departure. Now, his junior had woken him during the night with what he thought was troubling news.

"Hmm?"

"Where's Naruto?"

Kakashi stole a sidelong glance for the two empty cots. One belonged to Yuukimaru the boy they'd been tending to since the crystal-user had dissapeared. The other belonged to Konoha's number one knuckle-headed ninja. It took very little in the way of imagination to wonder where he'd gone...

* * *

><p><em>(Meanwhile, in an undisclosed location)<em>

"So this is where you were." A voice called from the treetops. "I didn't think you'd died."

Guren's head snapped up. Moments ago, she and Yuukimaru had bid this country farewell. Now, they were suddenly accosted by an intruder. But that voice_...she knew it._ She knew that voice, and it instantly set her on edge. She'd half-expected it to be Kabuto, come back for them in some petty act of revenge. But Kabuto didn't have blond hair. He didn't wear orange, either. He didn't have the most wonderful pair of baby blue eyes_...stop thinking that!_

The crystal-user slammed a lid on _that_ train of thought before it could devour her rationale. Steeling herself, she cupped a hand to her cheek and called:

_"Naruto?"_

"Naruto-niisan!" Yuukimaru cried, his violet eyes alight with glee.

Standing there upon a mighty bough, was Uzumaki Naruto. His orange and black tracksuit hung open at the chest, exposing the simple black tee beneath. His normally bright slacks had faded to a burnt orange after continuous exposure to the saltwater. Despite all this, not a hair was out of place. He looked...calmer than before. Like a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He smiled as he swung himself down from the branch, planting his feet firmly on the ground and standing before them.

"Yo." He snapped off a mock salute. "Long time no see, Guren. Yuukimaru."

Guren remained on edge.

"Why are you here?" She moved to place herself between him and Yuukimaru. "You're not still-

"No!" Naruto shouted, then calmed himself. "No. Actually, I wanted to tell you guys a story."

"A story?" Yuukimaru asked eagerly.

_(One lengthy explanation later)_

"So...you've sealed the Sanbi...into yourself?" Guren exclaimed aghast at the end of his tale. "How could you do such a thing?"

"I didn't have much of a choice." Naruto shrugged nonchalantly. "It kinda...sealed itself into me."

Guren felt her jaw go slack.

"So...that turtle is inside you now?" Yuukimaru stared in awe. "How did it fit?"

Naruto sweatdropped.

"Eh..." Naruto folded both hands behind his head. "Its kinda complicated. Don't worry though. She's harmless."

"That thing's a _she?"_ Guren was incredulous. "Oi...what makes you so sure it won't go berserk again?"

A muscle jumped in his jaw.

"Trust me when I say she'll _never_ harm you again."

Guren flinched.

...Gomen."

"Hehehe." Naruto couldn't help but to chuckle. "Sorry about that." He scratched at the back of his head. "Well, better me than Yuukimaru!" Surprisingly he didn't look all that dejected. If anything he seemed...happy? Guren couldn't believe her eyes and ears. How could he be happy! He was the jinchuuriki of his village! He shouldn't have been _able_ to contain another bijuu, let alone one as violent as the Sanbi!

"Did it hurt?" Yuukimaru asked, imagining Naruto swallowing the Three-Tailed turtle whole.

"Nope!" Naruto grinned, slapping a hand against his stomach. "Not a bit!"

"Sugoi!" The boy practically had stars in his eyes. "You're incredible, Naruto-niisan!"

Guren shook her head.

Unbelievable!

Not only had Naruto successfully tracked them down, but he'd taken on another tailed beast as well! Was that even possible? She'd never heard of a jinchuuriki housing more than one biju at a time before. That Naruto was able to do something like that spoke volumes for his character, and raised her already high opinion of him by several notches. This was the shinobi who'd saved her when she didn't want to be saved. Who'd treated her wounds, despite the fact that she'd been her enemy. The one who had, _had carried_ her when she couldn't walk. Carried! Her! And now he'd saved Yuukimaru from being used to manipulate the Sanbi ever again. And in the proccess taken on a burden heavier than life itself.

_He's so...so...so...incredible._

Before she knew what she was doing, Guren had kissed him.

It was a chaste kiss; her lips brushing across his for a faint beat, and pulling away just as quickly. Unable to believe what she'd done she jerked backward. Naruto wasn't quite so lucky.

Naruto _flopped_ backwards.

"N-N-N-Nani!" He spluttered, scrambling to his feet! "What the hell ewas that for?"

"B-Because!" Guren slapped both arms over her chest and turned away, unable to meet his gaze. "You...You have to take responsibility for your actions!"

"Responsibility?" Naruto exclaimed aghast. "What do I have to take responsiblity for?"

"You know damn well what you did!" Guren snapped back, flustered. "Don't play stupid!"

"I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Oh, yes you do!"

"Do not!

"Do too!"

"Not!

"Too!"

"Not!"

_"Too!"_

"Now wait just one free-frickin' second-

"Naruto-sama!"

_"Geh!" _The blond stiffened, all protest draining from his frame. Twitching, he turned in the direction of the far-off cry. He quivered all over as if he'd seen a ghost, almost as if he were actually afraid. The life leached from his face as she looked on, and it looked as though he might bolt in the opposite direction. He never got the chance.

"Well, it was nice seeing the two of you again!" Naruto exclaimed rapidly, obviously unseetled by this turn of events. "But I really should be going...

"What was that just now?" Yuukimaru asked. "I thought I heard a voice...

Naruto went pale.

"It's...It's nothing!" Naruto insisted, forcing a nervous laugh for the boy's sake. "Nothing at-

_"I finally found you, Naruto-sama!"_

That _nothing_ suddenly glommed Naruto from behind in a flying tackle. Guren had just enough time to gawp at a curtain of red and silver hair and an eye wrapped in bandages before the unfortunate pair collided with her and took the three of them down rawling in a gaggle of arms and legs. Sprawled out across the forest floor, she felt a hand grope something that should not be groped. Her face flared an incredibly bright shade of pink, brighter still than the crystals she commanded. Flailing wildly, her hand closed around something soft and malleable and in her haste to away, squeezed.

"Ah!" The newcomer cried out in surprise and perhaps a tiny bit of pleasure. "Naruto-sama, who is this person? They seem rather...friendly."

"That's my line!" Guren growled, swatting the girl's hand away from her ass as she clamored onto her hands and knees. "Who the hell are you, anyway?"

"I'm Kamehime!" The girl sat up and beamed brightly from where she lay atop Naruto, accidentally stradling the unfortunate_-or fortunate-_genin. "Well, my real name is Isobu but I don't like to be called that. Oh, and I'm also the Sanbi! I am very pleased to meet you, Guren-san!" Then she paused, touching a delicate finger to her lips. _"Oh,_ I wasn't supposed to say that was I, Naruto-sama?" As she said this, a dumbstruck Yuukimaru tried to understand what was happening. A strange lady had just tacked Naruto-nii and Guren-san. She also claimed to know Naruto-nii and Gure-san. But this nice lady was _also_ the Sanbi? But the Sanbi was a turtle! And this lady... well, she wasn't.

Yuukimaru and Guren exchanged a glance.

_"Huh?"_

Naruto groaned.

"It's just one thing after the other...

Meanwhile, sensing the boy's confusion, Kamehime turned toward him.

"Konichiwa!" She chirped, waving at boy whom she'd once tried to kill. "Yuukimaru-kun!"

"H-Hello." The boy waved weakly, scuttling behind his mother figure.

Guren sat up eyeing the bright-eyed girl with wariness and trepidation. She didn't trust this girl. No way in hell was this the Sanbi. She might be hyperactive and her hare was indeed strangely colored, but there was just no possible way she could be the Three Tailed Turtle. For starters she was just way too calm! That giant fucking thing had tried to obliterate her only a few days ago! And here she was, just chatting amiably away like nothing had happened!

"Ano...are you really the Sanbi?" Yukimaru asked quietly.

"Of course I am!" Kamehime laughed. "Don't you believe me?"

"Um...

"I know!" Sanbi snapped her fingers. "I'll show you!"

"Stop!" Naruto crossed his arms in an X-motion before grabbing the girl's wrist in an iron claw. "Don't do that here!"

"Aw, why not?"

"Because you'll destroy the forest! We're trying to keep a low profile, remember!"

"Oh...right." She chuckled sheepishly. "Gomen, Naruto-sama."

Guren sweatdropped.

_'Is this girl actually serious?'_

* * *

><p><em>(Several hours after the fact)<em>

Tobi was not pleased.

First, he'd gotten into a fight with Deidara-senpai. Then he'd gotten _separated_ from Deidara-senpai. _Then_ he'd wandered out to a certain lake and disocvered their quarry _before_ Deidara-senpai; the Three-Tailed Turtle, all on his own! Oh, his Senpai would have been so pleased with Tobi! But everyone had been fighting over it! So he had to hurry and run back to Deidara-senpai before they sealed it away! Only, he hadn't been able to find his senpai! He'd gotten lost instead! He'd spent hours and hours and hours running around in circles in the dark and he hadn't been able to find anyone...

Now even covered in mud and leaves as he was, his Akatsuki cloak utterly ruined, Tobi ran so swiftly that even his senpai was forced to keep up.

He'd run back to Deidara-senpai as fast as his legs could carry him. He'd insisted he'd found the Sanbi; that Konoha and another, unidentified force, were clashing over it. But now there was nothing. Nothing, save the Anbu his senpai had obliterated in typical artistic fashion. Which meant that something had to be here. It had to be, if Konoha'd left a squad of Anbu Black Ops guarding it.

"I don't see anyone, Tobi." The blond bomber drawled. "Are you sure its here?"

"Tobi _is_ a good boy!" Tobi insisted. "I saw it here, senpai! Really, I did! Right here! I'm certain of it!" He glanced around frantically as he said this, failing to find any trace of a giant turtle or enemy ninja. "Maybe the Sanbi is hiding, senpai?"

Deidara sighed.

"If you say so...

_(Five hours later)_

Deidara and Tobi had been searching for only a couple hours now, and already, Deidara wanted to explode Tobi into a beautiful fiery haze. He thought Sasori was a pain in the ass because he always complained about his tardiness, or his habit of saying that he was making him wait or how he called his art forever and then he goes and dies. _Tobi_ was loud, obnoxious, always called him senpai and was too goofy. Often, Deidara wondered how Tobi became a member of Akatsuki, or even how he became a ninja in the first place.

He really missed the old pupper master sometimes, at least he gave him quiet moments. With Tobi there was never one.

When Tobi would talk Deidara would say, "Shut up, hmm."

When Tobi would sing Deidara would shout, "SHUT UP…HMM!"

Now, Tobi was asking questions.

"Senpai, are you sure you're looking hard enough?"

"..."

"Senpai, maybe its under this rock? Nope not under here. Maybe this one?"

"..."

"Seeeennnpaaaaiiiii-

_"Tobi,"_ Deidara growled as he dipped a hand into his clay pouch, "I thought you said the Sanbi was in the lake, hmm?" Eye glinting he brought a baleful gaze to bear upon the organization's newest member. "We've been here for...five...freaking...hours. **WHY THE HELL ISN'T IT HERE, HMM!"**

"Tobi thinks that Deidara-senpai isn't looking hard enough." Tobi suggested weakly. "Maybe if he wasn't so focused on his art...

**"I'll fucking kill you!"**

_BA-KRAM!_

"Tobi thinks that Deidara-senpai needs to work on his jutsu, because you missed Tobi by a mile!"

Deidara's left eye twitched out of irritation "I never miss Tobi, and I can guarantee when I want to hurt you that my aim is always one hundred percent." he said darkly as he prepared another before adding, "Besides, who in their right mind would create a jutsu that makes bombs just fall from the sky, baka? Think before you talk!Now," Having his fill of his partner's gib, the terrorist turned his attention back to the lake.

"Alright Tobi, if this one doesn't make the Sanbi appear, then you're going to get a heaping helping of my C3, hmm!"

Behind his mask, Tobi grew pale.

"Not that, Deidara-senpai! Anyting but that!"

* * *

><p><em>(Hokage's Office)<em>

In the end, Tsunade had ordered a retreat.

The mission was considered a success; because the enemy force had been defeated and the Sanbi successfuly sealed. Naruto's chakra network needed to be inspected, hence the reason for their retreat. Not only that, but there was the matter of Guren and Yuukimaru. Apparently, the former Otogakure nin had decided they could tag along. Without anyone to object_-and with Naruto vouching for Guren and her foster son-_Tsunade really hadn't any choice in the matter at the time.

She'd been forced to accept them.

Which lead to a rather interesting bit of information.

"The Jyuubi, huh?" She mused softly, tacking through another stack of paperwork. "I never thought it actually existed." She'd had her suspicions, sure, but prior to the Sanbi's information they'd all been for naught. _The Sanbi._ She didn't think it was possible for a Tailed Beast to do what she'd done. To be able to walk in the world in human form, and independently from her host, no less!

Clearly Konoha's knowledge on all things bijuu was sorely lacking. Did the Akatsuki know about this? Was this their reason for collecting them? And why did Orochimaru desire the Sanbi in the first place? Without the other bijuu it was one of the weakest, at least terms of chakra. And then there were rumors of the Nanabi, the Seven-Tailed Horned Beetle, running amok in the Land of Lightning. But hadn't the Akatsuki already captured it? Clearly they were missing something. Still...

The notion that a jinchuuriki_-that Naruto-_could contain more than one Bijuu disturbed her. Because there was nothing she could do about it. Extraction would mean death for the Kyuubi-container, regardless of which bijuu was extracted. A practice she was not willing to indulge, even for the sake of curiousity. Still, if the council kept petitioning to send Naruto after the Nanabi...

...she'd have to do something about it.

* * *

><p>"Aaaaaand this is Konoha!" Naruto announced as the group entered the gates of the the Leaf village. The group had traveled in relative silence and safety, despite everyone's initial fear they were being tailed. There was only one problem. Sanbi. Oh, she'd gotten along well enough with the Kiba and the boys. But the girls? Not so much. Guren was particularly frosty where the one-eyed bijuu was concerned.<p>

"Do we have to let "it" in too?" She asked, glaring bloody daggers at the Sanbi. Kamehime, for the most part, either ignored or didn't seem to notice it. She was too engrossed in a certain orange book Kakashi had loaned her. He'd offered one to Naruto during their travels too. Naruto, red in the face, said no! Now however, Kamehime looked up from her favorite reading material and gazed upon the village with awe.

"Sugoi!" She gasped, accidentally dropping the novel, much to Kakashi's dismay. "It's gotten so big since I've last been here!" She touched a finger to her forehead. "Or am I just smaller?" She laughed upon realizing that the latter was true. Naruto shook his head. It really was hard to believe that she was the Sanbi. If not for the three tails slinking out behind her back, you'd never know.

"Perhaps its best if Kamehime returns to the...ahem...seal, for now."

_"What?"_ Naruto and Kamehime asked in unison.

"She's not a shinobi." Yamato pointed out. "She can't perform henge. If the villagers see her, there's bound to be a panic."

"He's right, Naruto." Shizune added, noting the dejected look on the boy's face. "It will only be for a short time, I assure you." She bowed in the direction of the Sanbi herself, bending deep at the waist to show her respect. "Thank you very much for your cooperation in this matter, Sanbi-sama." To her credit, Kamehime actually returned Shizune's sentiment and performed bow of her own.

"I understand, Shizune-san."

"You...do?"

"Of course." The Sanbi smiled sweetly. "Thank you for taking care of me."

"O-Of course." Shizune repeated, doubly startled by the sincerity of the bijuu. She'd half-expected a vehement refusal, one the girl had often given when someone suggested she return during their journey home. For her to suddenly be so compliant was rather startling. So...why was she the only one who reacted? A swift glance at Yamato and her fellow jounin confirmed that neither had reacted in the slightest. It was...strange.

Kamehime turned toward Naruto and gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

"I'll see you soon, Naruto-sama." With a swift peck on the cheek she was gone. Leaving Naruto with several envious glares on the part of Lee and Kiba. Shino didn't seem to care on the matter. Yuukimaru seemed almost sad to see her go. Sai...well, he never could tell what _Sai_ was thinking. Sakura was a different story. She hadn't said so much as a two words to him since the Sanbi stopped her from punching him on the lake. She seemed strangely distant, as though she were thinking intensely about something. In the end he chalked it up as post-mission fatigue.

He didn't even want to look at Guren.

The former Otogakure nin had developed something of a grudge against the bijuu during their journey. She couldn't stand to be within three feet of the girl, much less tolerate her prescence. She wouldn't even speak to her. Perhaps this grudge stemmed from the beating she'd received at the hands of the Three Tailed turtle during its rampage? It remained a mystery. One Naruto was determined to solve if she was going to be staying in Konoha with Yuukimaru.

As for the remaining kunoichi...they kept shooting him strange looks; even as they went their seperate ways for debriefing. Especially Hinata. Why was that? Had Naruto done something wrong? Again? Yet another mystery that baffled him. Or was that just women in general? Nevermind! All this thinking was hurting his head! He continued to mull it over until they reached the Hokage's office. He only realized they were there once Shizune swung the door open.

"Well done." An age-old voice called from the center of the room. Naruto couldn't help but grin the moment he saw Tsunade.

Tsunade eyes zeroed in on the woman, as if trying to assess every minute detail about her. "Naruto tells me you want to join our shinobi forces."

Guren nodded. In truth, she just wanted to be with Yuukimaru and Naruto. However, being a kunoichi was really the only thing she knew how to do. It showed in the way she stood, silently evaluating the room for an escape route, should everything go south. Now Naruto did steal a glance at the crystal-user. Surely she wouldn't bold. Right? Hoping that she wouldn't do anything stupid was one thing, but if she actually ran...

"Well this is going to be a huge pain in the ass", the old woman sighed, thinking about the grief certain members of her council were going to give her. "Well, I suppose theire isn't any point in evaluating you now, is there?" She'd already read Kakashi's lengthy report of the Shouton user's skills and abilities and she'd no doubt that the woman could prove formidable, if provoked. Tsunade's true interest lay in the boy who clung to her hand.

"Fine! She can stay in the village provided she has the mandatory one month probation period before taking up any ninja duties…"

"You won't be allowed to leave the village without permission. You'll have to go through a number of psychological evaluations from one of our top interrogators. You'll only be allowed to take missions with a jounin to supervise you", she quickly pointed towards Kakashi and Yamato, "And you won't be allowed to go on anything over a B-rank unless otherwise stated by the end of your evaluation." The woman turned towards Yuukimaru. "And as for Yuukimaru, he showed an ability to control the Sanbi to a certain extent did he not?"

Guren went stiff.

Tsunade waved her worries away.

"Don't worry. We won't make him a shinobi. He's much too young."

Guren relaxed, if only marginally.

The problem however, remained.

Tsunade folded her arms and stared at Naruto for a moment.

"Jiraiya, get in here."

One of the windows in the office opened up, allowing the infamous toad sage to step inside. "Yo!"

"Ero-senin!"

The infamous pervert flinched at the nickname but nodded back, "Naruto."

Then he saw Guren.

"And who might this lovely lady be?" he asked, drooling. "A new recruit, perhaps?"

Guren bristled, the hairs on the back of her neck rising as one. She didn't know this man, but the sight of him brought back bad memories. The last time she'd consorted with someone his age it had been...unpleasant. Perhaps that explained her reaction. Perhaps not. Either way, Jiraiya suddenly found several dozen crystal shuriken hurtling toward him at breackneck speed.

"Back off, buddy!"

Jiraiya nearly fell over in his attempt to get away from the shuriken. In the end there was one shuriken too many, and he found himself pinned to the office wall. Too late she realized her mistake. She'd just attacked one of the sannin! She cursed and dispelled the shuriken, but the damage had already been done. So much for first impressions. You could hear a pin drop in the office such was the silence.

Then Tsunade laughed.

"It seems you've finally met your match, Jiraiya." She shook her head, still chuckling. "That's what you get for trying to come between a mother bear and her cub."

The time Jiraiya did fall over.

It took all Naruto had not to laugh at his mentor's plight. He, of all people, knew better than to come between Guren and Yuukimaru. He'd been on the business end of several Shouton attacks the last time he'd tried to take the boy away from her. Guren saw Yuukimaru as her foster child, and in turn she was like a second mother to the boy. Naruto, well, Naruto was like a brother to him? A father maybe? The thought made his cheeks to darken. If he was a father and Guren was the mother then Yuukimaru was their-_Stop stop STOP!_ What the hell was wrong with him today?

"Did you bring me all the way here just to embarass me, Tsunade?" Jiraiya huffed, dusting himself off. "I have research to do I can't just take a break from that out of the blue! Now, what is so important that you couldn't tell me yourself?" Her brow knitted in frustration Tsunade gave a dangerous smile. Instead of the scathing response he'd expected, she directed an speculative stare towards Uzumaki Naruto.

"If you'd be so kind, Naruto?"

The blond turned his attention inward.

_'You can come out now.'_

"Yay!" Naruto _jumped_ his eyes flying wide as he was promptly engulfed in a glom attack. "Shizune-neesan was right! That wasn't long at all." Eventuallly she became aware of the incredulous gaze directed upon her. She too her head away from his shoulder and gazed at Jiraiya. The man's mouth had fallen open and cracked the floor. Tsunade's eyes had widened, if marginally. Guren was tense, standing guardedly before Yuukimaru, who looked delighted to see his Kamehime-neesan again. Save for their expressions, none of the shinobi assembled in this room reacted.

Except of course Jiraiya.

"Did she just come...

Tsunade nodded.

...out of the seal?"

Another nod.

Kamehime waved.

"Pleased to meet you!"

Jiraiya had an aneurysm and was admitted into the hospital a few minutes later.

* * *

><p>"Well, that went about as well as I expected." said Tsunade as the medics carried Jiraiya away. "Alright. Now that we've taken care of that, lets get down to business." At that very instant someone knocked on the door.<em> Tap-Tap-Tap.<em> Naruto and the others turned toward it as one. Who could it possibly be at this hour? And what business did Tsunade speak of?

_"Enter!"_

The door swung open, revealing a familar face holding a long length of chain leading out of the room. Naruto gawped. This guy! He knew this guy! He hadn't aged a day since the Chunin Exams! Oh, of course he had _aged,_ but he certainly didn't look like it.

"Oh, its you!" Naruto grinned, recognizing the scarred instructor right away. "Ibbiki-san! Long time no see!"

The interrogator nodded sternly.

"You've grown, Naruto."

The genin grinned.

"And you haven't changed a bit!"

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"Did you bring her?" Tsunade asked. Ibiki nodded. "Very well then, bring her in."

He gave the chain a gentle tug.

"Come out." He commanded.

"Fuck you!" An expletitive sounded from beyond the door.

Ibiki gave the chain a hard yank.

"Aargh!"

A young woman topped forward through the door, her entire body bound in chains. She wore little more than a tattered prisoners garb; though her roughsack cloth did little to discourage the eye from her slender frame. Ibiki hauled her into the room and she spat in his face; uttering words that could make even the most hardened veteran blush with shame.

Naruto recognized her all at once.

Bright crimson hair, sullied with years of filth. Fierce brown eyes, threatening to bore holes through his skull. Fierce. Strong-willed. Independent. With a mouth to match. Hers was a face he had never forgotten, a face that mocked him in his dreams. A face that called him a failure. Weakling. Worthless. She along with three others, had conspired to prevent him from rescuing Sasuke. The last he'd seen her, she'd been buried under a tree, her legs broken. Well apparently, someone had healed them.

"Eh!" Naruto cried, his eyes bulging at the sight of the familiar kunoichi. "It's you again! I thought you were dead!"

"Well I'm not, dickhead!" The redhead snarled, falling back on her foul tongue during matters of durress. "So shut yer fucking trap! You fucking piece of shit!" She would have said more, had Ibiki not formed a seal with his free hand. The kunoichi yowled and crumpled into a gibbering heap, writhing in agony. Naruto almost felt sorry for her. It must have been painful. But feeling almost sorry was not the same as feeling sorry. That bitch! If not for her and the Sound Four, this never would have happened! Sasuke might've stayed in the village, if not for them!

"What is she doing here, Tsunade-sama?" Shizune asked, her tone flint. Apparently, she hadn't been briefed on their guest. She didn't look happy. She looked pissed. Naruto sympathized. The very sight of this woman filled him with rage.

"Naruto-sama, who is that?" Kamehime asked, sensing his distress.

"An enemy." Naruto was boiling with rage at the sight f her.

"The Anbu Black Ops recovered her shortly after your failed attempt to retrieve Uchiha Sasuke." Ibiki explained. "And as you can see she's harmless thanks to the seal I've put upon her forehead." A grim smile. "She's all bark and no bite now, this one."

"Oh, I'll bite something!" The girl hissed, her eyes narrowing into deadly slits. "Let me out of these chains!"

"We decided it would be best to bring her out," Ibiki continued. "As a former subourdinate of Orochimaru, she's the most likely to know about his movements." He exchanged a significant glance with Kakashi. "Though we weren't expecting you to bring back prisoners of your own...

"They're _not_ prisoners!" Naruto barked, "They're our allies!"

Despite herself, Guren flushed.

_'This kid..._

"Enough!" Tsunade slammed an open palm upon her desk, producing an earsplitting crack. "I healed your legs, _Tayuya,_ and I can just as easily break them again!" Cowed, the redhead uttered another oath and fell silent. For the second time that day, Naruto had to bite back laughter. For all Tayuya's talk, for all her words and all her bluster even _she_ feared Tsunade. Well, that was something they had in common, loathe though he might be to admit it.

"So why her?" Naruto asked. "Why bring her here?"

"I'm putting together a task force." Tsunade explained. "And in one month's time, Tayuya will be a part of it." When Naruto persisted with his vavcant _I don't understand_ look, she wiped that smirk smug right off his face. "Shikamaru will head it. Kakashi, Yamato, Shizune, Guren, Sakura, Hinata and yourself will be a part of it as well. In an additional month, I will give this task force a mission." Kamehime grabbed at his hand, and that was the only thing that prevented Naruto from flying into a fury. On a mission! With her! With the bitch who'd stolen Sasuke away from them? He was tempted to refuse, but with every fiber of his being he bid himself be silent. This was a mission. It was important and he had to accept it.

"And the mission is?" Naruto forced the words through his teeth.

"I'm glad you understand." Tsunade steepled her fingers and leaned across the desk. "As I've already said, once two months have elapsed, I will be sending you and your task force on a mission. That mission will be the capture and-or sealing of the Nanabi and-or its jinchuuriki. Use these two months well and prepare yourself! Dismissed, the lot of you!"

The silence was deafening.

Finally, Naruto broke it.

_"Eh?"_

**A/N: Kukuku...I had so much fun writing this chapter! Because...TAYUYA LIVES! And we get to see the Nanabi and possibly Fu! Hint Hint! I just couldn't bear to kill her off! Hope you enjoyed the Sanbi! Isn't she just adorable? A perfect candidate for the harem! And yes, in all likelihood Guren and Yukimaru will be returning to Konoha with Naruto and co. so expect many more adventures yet to come! On another note, poor Tobi. Today just isn't his day, is it? I hope you like the frame of mind I put him in. After all, he can't have everyone knowing who (Argh who are u exactly!) he is now, can he? Besides, I rather liked the old Tobi! Damn you Kisshimoto-san! Tobi is a good boy! Bring him back! **

**On a second note, I shall provide you all with a teaser. As you can see some things have been changed. Certain characters will live when they were supposed to be dead. Others will die when they deserve to live. Naruto seems to be acquiring himself a bit of a bijju harem now, doesn't he? Look forward to the next chapter, my friends! We'll see Naruto's newfound training, a bit of simmer sexiness in the soon-to-be Harem, and much much, more! Expect many long and epic chapter to come**

**Love you all and hope you keep reading and reviewing,**

**Nz**

**P.S.**

**R&R! =D**


	3. Of Training and Turtles

**A/N: Well, I'm happy to see that my female version of the Sanbi was so well received! And apparently everyone is glad to see Tayuya-chan alive and well. If she ends up in the harem Naruto will have his hands full, guaranteed! Now, as per request, the harem will ultimately go no higer than NINE at most. Any more than that and things will get seriously out of hand, and not even my unique brand of humor can deflect THAT much strain from our beloved blond. But to clarify, Sanbi! In. Guren! In! Tayuya! In? So many women! So little time!**

_I am Naruto-sama's partner. I know him...more intimately than you could ever dream._

_~Kamehime._

**Of Training and Turtles **

"I can't believe this!" Naruto fumed as they left Tsunade's office. "Why do I have to work with her! HER! Of all people! Why her!" He ignored his sensei's attempts to persuade him that this was for the best. Because it wasn't! He shouldn't have to put up this this! He shouldn't have to work with her much less consider her his comrade! It wasn't right! It wasn't fair! After everything she'd said, everything she'd done, they expected him to work with her! HER! And so on.

He stormed down the street, leaving Kakashi and Guren and all the others behind. Why! Why did he have to be paired up with that foul wench! What had he done to deserve this! Nothing in this lifetime, that's what! And still, Baa-chan saw fit to pair him up with her! With that foul-mouthed redheaded _onna_ of a woman!

Well at least _she_ had a nice body. Not to mention a nice rack and that tight, firm ass_-Argh!_ What the hell was wrong with him today! He'd been thinking about stuff like that since that last mission! Gradually however, his mind began to drift. He kept picturing her_-Tayuya-_writhing in agony. Weeping. Sobbing, as Ibiki used a nameless jutsu to traumatize her; to inflict debilitating pain upon her skull. Not one to shy away from pain himself, Naruto still thought Morino-san had been excessive in his attempts to curb the girl's disobedience. _Wait a second._ Wait one free-frikin second!

Was he actually feeling _sorry_ for her? _For her?_ No way!

The thought made his blood boil.

How could _he_ feel sorry for _her!_ After all she'd done, all she'd said, luring Sasuke away from the village with the promise of power...it made Naruto sick to his stomach! She was scum! She deserved to go back to the god-forsaken hole they'd stuck her in! Lock her up and throw away the key! No good bunch of bastards...

"Naruto-sama!"

He slowed, realizing at once who had called his name. As such, he narrowly evaded Kamehime. The Sanbi shot past him, her arms closing on emptied air as the boy shushined onto the nearest rooftop. He took one look at her and paled. She had that look about her again. _Damnit!_ Kamehime leapt after him forcing the blond to abandon his perch just in time for favor of another rooftop. Much to his dismay, Kamehime matched his pace perfectly and intercepted the blond before he could spring to safety.

Peristent wench!

"Oi!" He yelped, scrambling away from her in the darkened street. "What's with you, all of a sudden!"

"Naruto-sama's so skilled." Kamehime giggled before trying to glomm him again. "You won't get away!"

"The hell I won't!"

_Very_ persistent!

"Why do you keep dodging, Naruto-sama?" The sanbi grinned as she pounced upon him, "I'm going to wear you down eventually!" Naruto wriggled out from under her, well aware of the stares their scuffle continued to draw. The men they passed were looking at him with outright envy. Most of the women looked like they were about to beat him into a crater and within an inch of his life for showcasing what clearly they believed to be _ecchi_ behavior.

"You know damned well why I'm dodging!" Naruto snapped back as he bolted away. "Sakura-chan almost broke my balls the last time you did this! Now cut it out, Kamehime! _Right now!"_ He came about and olded his arms and would say no more, silently willing his tennant to obey. Surprisingly, she did. She inclined her head and nodded, dismounting the rooftop, just as easily as he did.

"Just like that?" Naruto gawped upon landing. "All I had to do was tell you to _stop?"_

"But of course, master!" Kamehime nodded emphatically. "I am your willing slave! If master commands it..." She made a show of wiggling her hips, to which Naruto blushed and tore his gaze away. Damn but she _was_ persistent! If she kept this up then_-sorry Sakura-_his willpower wasn't going to last much longer. Then it hit him. _Slave._ When had she gone from being his new partner to his...his...his...

"S-S-S-Slave?" Naruto clamped a hand over his nose to stem the sudden blood flow. _Damn you Ero-Senin!_ Kamehime scooted closer to him, grinning broadly. Naruto scooted backward, his back striking the wall. It occured to him that he could easily leap away again, but his body refused to obey. Naruto remained frozen; unable to move, unable to breathe, unable to think as she edged toward him.

"If Naruto-sama commands it...

He gulped, this time very loudly.

He jerked backward.

_Violently._

However Kamehime advanced to in turn bring her hands around him. The bright haired shinobi didn't know where to look, feeling more and more tense. "Relax, Master..." Kamehime whispered, making him slowly turn to look at her. "You don't have to be so nervous." She seemed to glimmer in the dim light; shining like the moon itself. She was utterly beautiful, Naruto realized. In the short time he'd known her, he hadn't thought this until just now.

He saw in her eye something she couldn't identify. There was some warmth, affection and yet something about the spark they had reminded him ofâ€¦ hunger? That wasn't quite it. But before he could recognize it, it was gone. Naruto stayed still until he could stand it no more. He opened his mouth to say something-

-only to have her lips clasp his own.

His eyes shot open in surprise; her kiss was cool but gentle, her two lips caging his upper lip between them. He wanted to kick him, to scream out in anger, but he was completely overwhelmed by her as she released his wrist and cupped his cheek with her hand. He soon found herself returning the kiss, deepening it as he opened his mouth and slid his tongue out and against hers. She reached upwards with her arms and wrapped them around his neck as she pulled his body closer to hers. Naruto, he felt like he was betraying his feeling sfor Sakura, but he simply couldn't bring herself to pull away from her lips and her arms and _oh _her-

"S-Stop!" The blond broke away, throwing up his arms in consternation. "You need to stop doing that!" Kamehime seemed satisfied, and touched the jade necklace resting on her chest with the tip of her fingers.

"If Naruto-sama says so...

The girl pouted, sulking after the failed glomm attack, but contented herself to loop an arm in his all the same as they continued down the street. Naruto wanted to discourage her from such displays of blatant affection, but he just didn't have it in him. If she wanted to hold his arm, then fine. He'd had a long day and _he_ just wanted to go home and sleep. He noticed the odd glances everyone kept shoothing them, but he didn't care. He was beyond caring at this point. He stole a glance at the sky, alarmed to see that it was already darkening. Twilight would be upon them soon, and already, he could see the moon taking the place of the sun in the sky.

"I still can't believe this." He grumbled, though it was half-hearted. "Why do we have to work with that crazy sound chick?"

"Is something troubling you, master?" Kamehime nuzzled her cheek against his, her lone eye narrowed in an expression that could only be described as pure bliss. Naruto was nearly stricken by just how _damned cute_ she looked while doing that. _Aargh!_ Again with these impure thoughs! _Damn you Ero-Senin! I blame you!_ Trying_-and failing-_to ignore the bodacious beauty on his arm, Naruto turned his attention to the horizon as they walked.

"I'm pissed." He relented with a scowl. "I really don't want to work with that psycho bitch."

"By 'psycho' you mean Tayuya-chan, right?"

"Yeah." Naruto nodded, only for his brow to furrow in anger seconds later. "And quit with the chan! She's an enemy I don't trust her and neither should you!"

The biju simply smiled.

"Well, if she used to be from Oto, then she can track an enemy by sound alone, right?"

...in theory." Naruto frowned.

"That's good."

_"Huh?"_

"Because we'll be tracking Choumei-chan." Isobu remained dauntless. "She's a master of camoflauge! We'll need all the help we can get!"

"Choumei...chan?" With a rising sense of dread, Naruto glanced sidelong at his tenant.

"Hai!" Kamehime chirped. "She's my Onee-sama!"

Naruto sweatdropped.

"So the Nanabi's a she, then?"

"Hai!"

"And she's your big sister?"

"Hai!"

Naruto groaned.

"Why do I get the feeling this isn't going to be pleasant?"

Kamehime giggled.

"Don't worry, Naruto-sama."

"Eh?"

"I'm willing to share!" The Sanbi grinned, glomming him. "Together, I'm certain we can convince Choumei-chan that you're a good master!" There was a silence. Then Naruto jerked backward, eyes bulging. Was Kamehime actually suggesting he take on another Biju? Was that even possible-wait a second! He hadn't agreed to this! No way would he be willing to play host to another biju! Two demons were company...but three was a _freaking crowd!_

"Eh!" he cried! "Wait a second! I didn't agree to any of that!"

Kamehime wasn't having any of it.

"Oh, there's no need to worry, master! I'm sure Choumei Onee-sama will _happy_ to have you as her master!"

_"Aargh!"_

* * *

><p><em>(Meanwhile in Otogakure)<em>

Orochimaru was not pleased.

Not at all.

Not only had they _failed _to capture the Sanbi, but, if his spies were to be believed, Konoha had retrieved it! _Konoha!_ Despite his best efforts to eradicate it, the Leaf continued to plague him! Not only that, but Kabuto's mission to sieze the Sanbi had been a complete failure. Konoha had claimed the beastly turtle, which would only serve to increase its already significant military might even further.

But what truly disturbed him was Kabuto's latest report.

He'd lost Guren and Yuukimaru.

The crystal-user and the boy had conveniently disappeared during the chaos, leaving him the sanin none to blame for their failure. Kabuto had reported their disappearance and Orochimaru hadn't believed a word of it. Secretly, the former sanin feared Kabuto had put and end to them. His right hand man held a strong intense dislike for Guren for quite some time now. Such animosity was only natural, after all.

But in the end, none of that mattered. Once he had Sasuke-kun's body, he would at long last have the Sharingan. He would be all but invincible. Then he would crush Konoha, biju and all. Akatsuki would soon follow, allowing him all the time in the world to amass his knowledge of jutsu. He would live for as long as he saw fit, and none would dispute his rule.

"Soon, Sasuke-kun. Very soon...

Orochimaru never did get to finish that sentence, as a lance of lightning speared through the door and skewered his arms...

* * *

><p><em>(The Next Morning)<em>

Now his training began.

According to Ero-Senin, Naruto had to master the basics of Kamehime's chakra. That included her chakra shroud, conversing with her, and summoning her outside of his body. He already had the first part down pat_-although it still made him look like a girl whenever he used it-_and now he the Toad Sage wanted his disciple to be able to summon his tenant in less than three seconds, without moment's notice. Jiraiya was under the false impression that this would be difficult for Naruto.

How little he knew.

"Alright kid," The sanin folded his arms and took three steps back while crossing himself. "Let 'er rip."

"Already did." Naruto smirked proudly.

_"Eh?"_

"Ohayo, Jiraiya-san!" This time Kamehime didn't have to poof into existence. She appeared behind him! Her intitial appearance aside, Jiraiya was startled all the same. Isobu, for the most part, seemed as perky as ever. And, just like before, she'd come completely out of nowhere!

"Kami!" Jiraiya clutched at his heart. "Don't do that!"

Kamehime pouted.

"Gomen, sensei."

As before, the older man was mesmerized by her humility.

Her silver/scarlet hair bound held back in a braid, one could easily see the bandages enveloping her right eye. How she could see without it was beyond him. Perhaps even she didn't know. Regardless, she was as stunning as ever. And those three tails...she truly was the Sanbi. Such chakra! Passive though she might be at the moment, the girl was exuding mass amount of the stuff. He'd have to teach the girl a henge couldn't very well be out and about looking like this now, could she?

"Wai, Naruto-sama!"

And just like that, the moment was broken. Kamehime threw her arms around Naruto and immediately proceded to nuzzle her cheek against his own. Naruto, red in the face, struggled to extricate himself from the Biju's bone-breaking grip, but to no avail.

"Hey, take it easy!"

Jiraiya did not envy them the prey they sought. Well, actually he did. To have a beautiful woman sealed inside you, able to come and go as she pleased, was the dream of any super-pervert. To have said woman call you "master" and be susceptible to your every whim and desire was something out of a fantasy novel. He'd have to include that in the next Icha Icha novel, and he had just the title for it! A boy and his biju...

_I shall call this masterpiece...Of Foxes and Turtles!_

With a perverted giggle he turned his attention back to the task at hand.

"Now, why don't I show you a basic chakra control exercise?"

Naruto's expression said it all: _There's no way in hell!_

"I can control my chakra." Kamehime insisted, her tone steely.

"That's unlikely." Jiraiya reiterated. "Your _chakra_ is sealed inside Naruto. _You_ may be able to come and go as you please, but your chakra? That's got to be another story." He half-expected her to throw a hissy fit at the declaration. Surprisingly she did not. Kamehime smiled. It was a dangerous thing _that_ smile. Sickly sweet and overly confident as though she knew something he did not.

"I can defend myself." she repeated, softer this time.

"Suit yourself." Jiraiya turned to Naruto. "Well, you heard her, didn't you?"

"Eh?"

"I want you to attack her, gaki!" Jiraiya snapped.

"No way!" Naruto protested. "I can't attack her! She'll get hurt!"

"I'll be fine, Naruto-sama." Kamehime stated. "Please, do as Jiraiya-sensei asks."

"Alright...

Naruto summoned a clone and began channeling chakra to his hand. Within seconds he held a fully formed Rasengan. Kamehime didn't budge. She took one look at the spiraling sphere and smiled. It was a mysterious smile that. Almost as if she knew something he did not.

Kamehime didn't so much as bat an eyelash. Instead, placed her hands together in a seal. Rat. Ram. Boar. Her single eye glinted as the blond bore down upon her; rasengan in hand and about to mow her down. Before he could however, the Sanbi exhaled forcefully and expelled a geyser of water. Instead of tearing forward, however, it congealed into a pool of liquid between the two of them. Almost...like a mirror.

_"Suiton: Mizukagami no Jutsu!"_

Much to Jiraiya's amusement, the Sanbi seized said mirror and wrested it toward the earth so it was facing parallel to them. In response to Naruto and his rasengan, another rasengan-bearing Naruto emerged from the vortex, thrusting its sphere forward in the exact same instant as the original. Naruto didn't even have a chance to slow. He'd already thrust his arm forth and the bunshin mimicked the action flawlessly. The result was catatastrophic. When the two rasengan collided the entire clearing exploded in a geyser of chakra.

_"What!"_

Drenched from head to toe, Naruto flopped backwards, his jacket tearing itself open from the sudden explosion. Jiraiya arched an eyebrow. Kamehime grinned, a gorgeous white streak of a grin that left Naruto gawping at her.

The reflection, merely dissolved into a puddle.

"Had enough?" Isobu smiled coyly.

"Like hell!"

"If Naruto-sama insists," Kamehime shrugged. "I'll show you what else I can do."

Then Isobu retaliated.

_Violently._

Her three tails uncoiled and crackled outward, securing themselves round the genin even as he tried to escape._ It was futile._ The first found the leg, the second an arm and the third hoisted him free of the ground altogether. In short order Naruto was left dangling upside down by his feet, much to Jiraiya's amusement.

"I give!" The blond croaked, his face turning red. "Now put me down!"

Kamehime complied, gently lowering her master to the ground.

She cast a stern glare in Jiraiya's direction.

"Told you so, sensei."

The Perverted Hermit shrugged, admitting defeat.

"Well, color me corrected." He took a long glance at the skyline and patted his stomach. "Alright then, let's break for lunch and meet back here in an hour." Before Naruto could say anything, Jiraiya promptly 'volunteered' that he would go into town and bring back lunch. And _before_ his student could protest, before he could say that he'd already packed the supplies, the Sage vanished in a shushin.

In reality, he didn't go that far. He simply camoflauged himself, hunkering down in a nearby bush to observe his disciple and tenant. Taking out a pen and paper, he stifled a perverted giggle. Forget lunch! Now was the perfect time to compile research for his new Icha Icha novel: _Of Foxes and Turtles!_ All he'd need to do was just observe them for a few hours and make sure he wasn't discovered.

He could always toss out some lame excuse about being late. After all, he had two months to whip the kid into shape! Surely _one day_ couldn't possibly do any harm. Grinning from ear to ear, he watched Kamehime point toward a stone monument located squarely in the middle of the training ground. After he explained to her that it was erected in honour of Konoha's fallen heroe's, the Sanbi seemed to fold in on herself.

"So many shinobi have died here," she murmured. "All because of Onee-sama's anger...

"Huh?"

"N-Nothing!" Kamehime waved her hands frantically, hoping Naruto hadn't heard her reference to the Kyuubi. "I just think its sad that so many have died during wars fought over me and my kind." A grimace of self castigation. "We've caused so much strife for your kind...

"Yeah, well, that was a long time ago." Naruto mumbled, unable to meet her sad, lonely iris. "I'm sure you didn't mean to do that back then. You couldn't control yourself like before, right?"

"I suppose." She brightened. "So I guess my feelings for you shouldn't be any different now either." She moved away, smiling broadly back at him and just at that moment he felt ten meters tall. So now he was at peace with himself about the biju and Isobu, but he was beset with concerns. What if something happened to them during the fight ahead? What if they were hurt or...he couldn't bring himself to finish the thought. Nothing bad would happen to them, that was all. He wouldn't let it. He glanced at her, kneeling in slience at the edge of the monument, and promised himself he would keep _her_ safe no matter what. That would be his job. His mouth tightened with determination as he made his pledge.

And it certainly helped that she belonged to him. Her and those sweet, tasty lips...

_Wait a sec! _Naruto stopped himself. _I did not just think about how sweet, and tasty her lips were! They were soft, though. And warm. And-no, NO! This is wrong! Stop thinking about it!_

Jiraiya nearly fell over.

_'Kami, this kid is a goldmine! I'll have the next novel out before he knows its all about him!_

* * *

><p><em>(Hours later)<em>

Naruto was exhausted.

Ero-Senin hadn't returned until just before sunset, claiming he'd had to help an elderly lady cross the street. Who the hell did he think he was? Kakashi-sensei? Anyway, he'd been forced to train with Kamehime until sunset, and he was utterly drained. Now, he flopped down onto his bed, half expecting Kamehime to vanish into the seal as soon as his head hit the pillow.

She did not vanish as soon as his head hit the pillow.

"Naruto-sama?" He heard her voice overhead, felt her fingers stroking his hair. "Are you still awake, Naruto-sama?" He exhaled forcefully, idly wondering why his tenant didn't reek of from their previous exertions. She always smelled sweet, like the scent of the sea. It wasn't a bad smell, now that his sleep-addled mind thought about it. In fact, hers was a very nice smell.

"You smell nice." He interjected blearily.

"Mmhmm." Kamehime continued to stroke his hair. "Just like ramen."

Naruto's voice was drowsy.

"I do like ramen...

"Do you like _me,_ Naruto-sama?"

"'Course I like you...

"Really?"

"Yes, really." Why was she asking him this? He was tired!

Something soft_-very soft!-_squished against his back. She was hugging him, he realized. Embracing him. There was none of her earlier mischief as she held him; none of those wandering hands or lingering gaze. She simply held him, her lips pressing gently against the back of his head.

"I love you, Naruto-sama."

"I...love..

He was falling alseep now, barely even concsious...

* * *

><p>"Naruto-sama... Naruto-sama!:<p>

He must've drifted off.

_...wake up!"_

He must have, becuase he woke hours later to find that it was still dark. She was shaking him, urging him to rise from his slumber. He didn't feel at all rested, so he couldn't have slept long. Damn. And he'd been having such a nice dream, too...

Blearily Naruto blinked up at her.

"What?" He barely manged to force the words out; barely made out her silhouette through eyes gummed from sleep. "What do you want?" He meant for the words to dissuade her, to tell her that he was too tired for whatever she had in mind. What did Isobu have in mind, anyway? Was she going to try and kiss him, again? His body didn't even have the strength to resist if she tried.

Kamehime beamed, brighter than even the sun.

"Come with me." She whispered, grinning. "I want to show you something!"

"It's late." Naruto growled, irritated. "What could possibly be so important that-

"Come on!"

_"Hey!"_

Naruto perked up immmediately.

He followed her outside, followed her, as a soft sound reached his ears. Before long, he found himself at the edge of the village. She led him through the trees, tugging at his wrist all the while, leading him ever onward. She refused to state their destination, but he could hear the sound of running water. It felt like they were being watched. Maybe that was lack of sleep talking. Maybe not. He could just make out shapes in the darkness, humanoid figures, crouched amidst the tree branches, watching them. Each hidden by a mask, their faces turned after him as he followed his biju.

What the hell were the Anbu Black Ops doing way out here at the lake?

"This way, Naruto-sama!" Kamehime ushered him onward. "Hurry!"

Then he heard it; a sound, rising above that of the stream, and the ambient atmosphere of the lake. Whistling. No, not quite a whistle. A tune, perhaps. A melody, sort of. The melody you'd produce from an instrument. But what instrument was this...

Overshadowing that soft whistle, came a _sound_. It was strange, this sound, a reedy thin cry, that echoed on into the distance, as though it were the dying gasp of an ancicent creature. It hung in the air, reverberating around them for what seemed like an eternity, before finally losing its tune and fading sadly into the night. However, another chorus immediately overlapped its final note, filling the void that had been left to it by its short lived predecessor.

The antithesis to its parent, this melody contained the voice of a young woman's. Soft and despairing, vibrant and brimming with boundless desire, emanating boundless grief and sorrow within this, its final melody. Unlike its bretheren, it was easily recognizeable, and distinctly human in origin. 'Twas many things, yet all were one and the same. It was the voice of a young woman, whispering softly to her lover. It was the laughter of a little girl, innocent and kind. It was the cry of an insatiable demon, raw with fury and battle lust. It was the sound of many, and the voice of one. It was joy and sadness, anger and weakness, mistakes made, and yet to be made.

_And it was coming from a flute._

Someonewas stood there in the lake, naked as the day she was born. She was beautiful. Horns sprouted from her head, lending her a fierce, feral appearance, even while she played her instrument. Black scrawl knitted out from her neck, spreading across her arms and shoulders staining them and then her entire body a gorgeous sun-kissed brown as he watched her play.

The melody she wove was a strange one. Sad. Mournful. And then she cringed, and the music stopped. She shuddered. Her bronze skin receded even as he looked on, tan flesh fading back into pale alabaster, marks receding into a seal etched into her neck. Naruto froze. _That was a curse mark._ The only one who had a curse mark other than Sasuke, the only one surviving member of Orochimaru's forces that had red hair...

_Tayuya._

Naruto took a step forward, suddenly desperate to get closer. A twig snapped beneath his heel. She swung around and pinnioned him with a gaze. He froze, torn between the flight and fight response all men have when they're caught peeping. Eventually, he settled on the latter.

_"Shit,"_ he murmured. The word burst from him with a little pop, much louder than he wanted it to be. For a moment she stood motionless. Her lush lips were parted, ruby red hair lofting around a pale, beautiful heart-shaped face, brown eyes flecked with golden amber and wide with surprise.

He stared back at her, sharing an equal measure of astonishment. She was the most stunning woman he'd ever seen. He hadn't been expecting that. He'd known she would be naked, but even so, he hadn't been expecting it. Naruto took a step backward. She dissolved as soon as he moved. A vison of beauty one moment, gone the next in a shriek of indignation.

"You!" She hissed, the marks spreading across her flesh like wildfire. "You were watching me the entire time, weren't you!

"Th-This isn't what it looks like," He stole a glance for Kamehime, desperate to explain that he had, in fact, been guided here by her.

Kamehime was nowhere to be seen.

There was a silence.

Then:

**_"YOU FUCKING PERVERT!"_**

Naruto ducked as she threw a rock at him.

"Stop!" He cried, dodging another sharpened projectile. "I didn't come her to peep! I came because I heard the sound of your flute!"

**WHAM!**

Black spots speckled before his vision as a stone struck him between the eyes. Naruto yelped and went down in a heap, half-expecting the deadly barrage to continue. When it did not, he dared to raise his gaze and settle into a combative crouch. Scrubbing at his eyes with the back of his hand, he warily raised a wrist in his defense.

"I swear," He began slowly, "I'm not lying."

Tayuya stilled, the rock clattering from her fingertips.

"If you're lying, I'll fucking kill you."

"I'm not!" Naruto said, flinging up his hands in exasperation. "I came here because I heard the flute! I swear on my nindo!"

"Alright, then...

The marks receded, slowly, into her flesh, leaving her human once more. Her eyes, however, retained their venom. She sank back from the shallows, an arm wrapped around her breasts, concealing them from view. Flushing, Naruto offered her his coat. She snatched it from him and donned it without a word, the large fabric serving to cover her up to her thighs, but no more. Her long, shapely legs left little to the imagination. Tayuya walked away from him took up her flute from the bank and stared at him for a moment.

"Would you...like to hear another?" She asked, softly.

"S-Sure." Naruto said, wishing nothing more than to escape with his hide intact. "I'd like that." If it meant listening to another one of her beautiful melodies, then so be it. Did he just think _beautiful?_ Must be the lack of sleep. Yes, that must be it. Surely he wasn't thinking such things. Not here, in the dead of night. Not with a tracing anklet wrapped around Tayuya's leg. Not with a horde of Anbu watching them from the shadows. Nope. Not at all!

Tayuya lifted the flute to her lips and began to play.

Somewhere in the treetops, Jiraiya silently praised his apprentice as he rapidly scribbled down notes for his soon-to-be novel.

**A/N:Poor Naruto! He just can't catch a break, can he? Well, I had to start his little makeup session with Tayuya eventually, and this was as good a time as any! I tried to make it as sincere-and humorous-as possible! I also hope you all get the hints for who will be in the harem so far, but eh, who knows? There may very well be more to come if Jiraiya and Kamehime have their way...**

**I'm still very pleased that this story seems to be a hit with most people. I also want to thank those readers who take the time to leave a review for the tale. They're very helpful in letting me know how the story is progressing with all of you. And they really do assist an author out in knowing what people like about a story. Thanks again to everyone for all of your support.**

**R&R! =D**


	4. Of Turbulence and Turtles

**A/N: Well, I'm happy to see that my female version of the Sanbi was so well received! And apparently everyone is glad to see Tayuya-chan alive and well. If she ends up in the harem Naruto will have his hands full, guaranteed! Now, as per request, the harem will ultimately go no higer than NINE at most. Any more than that and things will get seriously out of hand, and not even my unique brand of humor can deflect THAT much strain from our beloved blond. But to clarify, Sanbi! In. Guren! In! Tayuya! In? So many women! So little time!**

_"Love me or hate me. I don't care. Seriously though...love me, alright?"_

_~Tayuya._

**Of Turbulence and Turtles **

Danzo Shimura was a warhawk.

Get the job done. No matter the cost. No matter the sacrifice. If your comrades must die, then so be it. If an entire clan must be massacred in order to preserve the peace, then so be it. If a kage had to die to maintain the status quo, _then so be it. _He was a thief, a master maniplulator, some might even call him a murderer, though never to his face. Long had he strived in the shadows, long had he played the part of a cripple; that of an old man, a relic past his time, his prime. He'd endured countless grievances, nursed hundreds of grudges, all so that he might one day come to realize his dream.

Because Danzo Shimura was a patriot.

He was also a man who loved Konoha above all else. He would give anything to see her thrive, for her to prosper. For that was his goal, to see the Leaf stand above all others; to prove itself as the strongest village. The intel he held in his hands had brought him one step closer to realizing that goal. When Hiruzen had died, his ideals should have perished with him. Instead, they lived on, in this fool of a succesor. Mocking him. Insulting him, making light of all he'd done; all he'd sacrificed to get here.

But no more.

With this, he would at long last have what he desired.

"Leave us." He dismissed the messenger with a wave of his hand. The Anbu nodded, flickering away in a shushin.

And thus, the file finally came to Danzou's attention.

The boy had not one, but two biju sealed inside him! With the former being able to come and go as she pleased. Oh, Tsunade had tried to keep it quiet, but Danzou? He knew. Just as he knew of the boy's next mission; that he would soon be sent to confront the rampaging seven-tailed horned beetle in the north. Though his spy ring was formidable indeed, he did not know if the beast had simply broken free, or if its host yet lived. He supposed it did not matter. If he had anything to say about it, Konoha would have a third biju within its walls come winter.

And Danzo Shimura would be its host. Not that fool of a kage's son, Uzumaki Naruto. The boy knew next to nothing of the power he contained. The powers of the Sanbi, Kyuubi and if the mission was a success perhaps the Nanabi as well? Unacceptable. Should he ever learn to control it, to harness the power of three biju...no. Such a thing would not come to pass. Countermeasures were already in place; plans had been made and all his pawns readied to account for the unlikelihood_-nay, the impossiblity!-_of such an event.

It was only natural, that he, Danzou, wield such power himself.

For the sake of the Leaf.

* * *

><p><em>(Meanwhile)<em>

Naruto awoke on the riverbank with a mighty sneeze.

Blinking the sleep from his eyes, dimly registering the soft grass against his bare back, he yawned softly. Reluctantly to return to the world of the living, his body refused to otherwise comply.

The waters lapped at his toes, a lover's caress, tickling at the soles of his feet. He blinked the cobwebs away from his eyes, scrubbing at them with the back of a hand. He considered rising, but decided against it. After all he'd been through; all the pain, training, and sacrifice, he'd earned some peace and quiet, right? Wrong. Somehting was nagging at him, a lingering sensation he couldn't quite remember, causing himto dobut. _Meh._ If it was really _that_ important he'd remember it sooner or later. For now, for the first time in a long time...

...he wanted to relax.

He could just make out the sun, peeking through the leaves of the trees; a nervous child without its parent. Its luminance did not penetrate the clearing entirely however, leaving just enough shade for the jinchuuriki to see clearly without being blinded. It felt wonderful to just lay here; to let his worries drift away, to forget about the world, even for a little while. Just by laying here, he began to sympathize with Shikamaru. Ensorcelled in the utter peace and queit, it was easy to understand why the lazy Nara watched the clouds.

It was nice.

Up in the sky, far beyond the clouds, there were no Akatsuki members to hound him. No peril or threat of invasion from from Orochimaru. No promises to keep. He could simply relax and just _be._ It was enlightening, to say the least. Naruto, not really one for contemplation, found himself, for the first time in his life, not wanting to train. It was alarming, to say the least. His usual overabbundance of energy prevented him for staying in one place for more than a handful of seconds. At any given time, he had to be up, had to be moving, had to be doing something. Now, his hyperacitvity temporarily stymied by his newest tenant, Uzumaki Naruto lacked the desire to start his day just yet.

_"You musnt' think like that, Naruto-sama!" _Isobu's voice chided._ "We only have a few months to train before we go after Choumei-chan! Every second counts!"_

Aaaaaand just like that, the world came crashing down around his ears.

"Kamehime, wha-

He started_-violently-_memories of last night's misadventures came flooding back to him. Kamehime; rousing him in the middle of the night to bring him here. Tayuya; the soft sound of her music luring him closer until she saw him. Naked; her bare body gleaming in the moonlight. Indignation; fury flaring across her face as the curse mark slithered across her skin, pursued by a hail of expletitives. Surprise; her expression softening at his response, to which she raised the flute to her lips...

_(Flashback)_

_"Well, whaddya think?"_

_Naruto refused to honour Tayuya with a response as she clutched her flute within her fist, the melody slowly draining away from the air as she stood there, awaiting his answer. He was almost sad to see it go. Ah, but that was the difference. Almost, but not quite. His anger was still ever-present; burning in the pit of his stomach, a torrent of pent up emotion, threatening to give out at any given moment. He wanted to hate her, this redhead who continued to confound him so. He wanted her to beg, on her knees, for forgiveness; for mercy after what she and her comrades had done; for their part in luring Sasuke away from the leaf. Worse still, he wanted to kill her. To squeeze the life from her lungs, to watch, as the light faded from her eyes. _

_Five minutes ago, he'd been confident in his ability to do this. To end her life. Now..._

_...just couldn't._

_It didn't mean he had to like it, however. And he _didn't_ like it. Or her. At all. He had to keep telling himself that._

_Though it galled him to admit it, her melody had changed something within him. No wicked woman could possibly perform such a heart-wrenching melody as the one she'd just played. Certainly, not the souless wench he'd made her out to be. Now his hands trembled at the very thought of taking her life. Damnit! Naruto chewed on his lip until he tasted blood, the metallic tang exploding across his tongue. At this moment he wanted nothing more than to close his eyes and collapse, to fall asleep where he stood._

_"Did you like it or not?" The gravel in her tone nearly caught Naruto off guard; she wasn't going to ask him again. Gathering himself as best he could-which wasn't much when one considered Tayuya was half naked and wearing absolutely _nothing_ beneath that jacket-the genin contented himself to a stiff nod of aqueiscment._

_"I thought it was lovely too, master! Wouldn't you agree?" _

_Naruto nearly replied in kind before he realized Kamehime's voice came from within, not without. Thank kami! The _last_ thing he wanted to do was explain the biju's prescence here, surrounded by the Anbu. Hmm...now, I could call her out anyway-no!' mentally, he rebuked himself. Turning his attention outward, he opted to kill two birds with one stone. __"It was...nice." he relented aloud refusing to meet the redhead's gaze, lest she find another reason to pelt him with pebbles. He kicked a stone into the pool, hoping she wouldn't see how flustered he'd become._

_"Oh..._

_So focused was he upon his feet, he nearly missed it._

_"You...actually liked it?"_

_It was a small sound, barely a whisper, nigh undectable by human ears. Naruto didn't consider himself human by those standards._

_"Well, yeah."_

_Her eyes softened for a moment; those frozen chips of brown, breaking beneath his stare, the hard facade cracking, exposing the girl beneath. Chocolate brown eyes glimmered with amusement, disbelief, and perhaps, something more. Something sensitive. Vulnerable. It was gone before he could comment on either. She stiffened abruptly, pinnioning him with a gaze, where he stood._

_"I-It's not like I care or anything!" She folded her arms with a scowl, her words cutting across the clearing like a knife. "Dumbass!"_

_He wasn't quite sure how he ought to respond to that one. He needn't have worried._

_"Ask her to play another!"_

_Naruto nearly fell over, such was his surprise._

_"HUH?"_

_"I couldn't quite get a feel for her spirit that first time." The Sanbi chided, her voice ringing through the corridor of his mind for a second time. "Ask her to play another so I can be certain!" Naruto twitched. You think he would've gotten used to the unique mannerisms of his newest tenant by now, right? Wrong! He understood that she was a part of his life, and, as such, he was obligated to oblige her, but her request bordered upon the obscene and ridiculous. No way! There was no way. Absolutely no way, under pair or penalty of death, that he was going to ask-_

_"Could you play another?" _

_Damnit._

_Tayuya arched an eyebrow._

_"You shittin' me, Uzumaki?"_

_"N-Not at all!" he sputtered, mentally cursing his sudden lack of restraint. "J-Just play another one, damnit!"_

_Tayuya stared at him a for what felt like an eternity; a small, wistful smile tugging at her lips. For a moment, he thought she might refuse. Hell, she'd most likely tell him to 'fuck off' and they'd be right back where they started. In a sense, he was hoping for that. Praying for it, really. He would have gladly welcomed a return to the angry bitter girl he so abhored. Precisely why his heart quivered when the redhead sighed, her shoulders slumping in apparent defeat._

_"Ah, what the hell." Tayuya sighed, raising the flute to her lips for the final time. "I haven't quite completed this sonata yet, but I'll show you special..._

_(End Flashback) _

His last memory was that of Tayuya's melody; a lovely lullably, carrying on for hours and hours before finally lulling him to sleep. Naruto groaned aloud, fighting the urge to stick his head in a hole. Stupid! He'd been so very stupid! Baka! _Naruto no baka!_ Chastising himself for the slipup, the blond silently resolved to resist her charms when next they met.

Speaking of which...

...just where the hell was she?

_Gone._

The realization struck him like a chidori through the chest. She was gone. The only one who could track down Orochimaru; the one who'd stolen Sasuke. Gone.

Now, Tayuya was nowhere to be seen. Neither were her escorts; the masked men and women of the Anbu he'd seen last night having vanished with the daylight. They could've been suppressing their chakra but Naruto very much doubted that they were. Abruptly, it occurred to him. He must've been caught in a genjutsu! Meaning she'd escaped! Choking back a snarl, Naruto rose to his feet. Rather, he tried. But, what was this strange weight on his chest? Not enough to hold him down, not enough to prevent any real effort, he placed his arms against it began to push...

...and was rewarded with a soft moan.

_"Warm..._

Naruto froze; because he daren't look. He musn't look!

_"Ah...Kamehime?"_

"Hai?"

Naruto was somewhat accustomed to her appearance by now, so he didn't startle quite as easily when the avatar of the three tailed turled manifested herself above him, clad as ever in her strange attire. Unfortunately, that was the problem. If she was there...then who the hell was sitting on him? Just then, he caught a slash of red from the edge of his eye; the corner of his peripheal vision. Slowly _oh so very slowly _he turned his head toward the Sanbi, sweating many, many bullets.

"Ahahaha...Kamehime...you wouldn't happen to know where Tayuya is...would you?"

Her single eye narrowedm regarding him with no small amount of amusement, the jade green iris reflecting calmly against crimson sclera.

"Why," Kamehime began, pointing. "She's right there."

_"Shit!"_

He bolted upright, immediately fearing the worst. In the end, he needn't have bothered. _Tayuya_ lay sprawled atop him, her head resting squarely against his chest. She wore his jacket, wrapped around her frame, the beginnings of a small, contented smile pulling at her lips, even in slumber. He struggled to rise, to move, to disentangle himself from the buxom redhead, succeeding only in miring himself further as her arms wrapped around his neck in a loose embrace. Her hair, long and lustruous, a veritable curtain of crimson, brushed across his nose, tickling him. Naruto couldn't help himself. He tried to hold it back. Tried to reign it in; tried very _very_ hard, so very hard, and in the end, failed utterly.

He sneezed.

_"Achoo!"_

There was a silence.

Biju and jinchuuriki exchanged a terse glance, each expecting the redhead to bolt upright at any moment. When she did not, Naruto exhaled a hearty sigh of relief.

"Whew...that was close."

"WAKE UP!" Kamehime shouted at the top of her lungs!

Naruto froze, as he felt movement beneath his neck.

"You've gotta be kidding me, Isobu! The hell was that for!"

The girl chirruped happily as Tayuya groaned, her lids flcikering open.

"I'll be going now!" Kamehime chirped, vanishing with a small 'pop' as the redhead began to stir. Before Naruto could speak, before he could call her back, before he could do anything at _all _a hearstopping hiss froze his blood in its very veins. Torn somewhere between a gasp and a snarl, it didn't bode well for him. Swallowing his fear, Uzumaki Naruto raised his head, gaze to meet her own. Oni! Demon! Akuma! All these thoughts, and more flashed through his mind as he anticipated her expression. Because Tayuya was awake. _Very much awake._

She looked at him with big eyes, mouth open in a round O. Her eyes flicked down then up, down again. Naruto was just about to speak when she snarled, pinnioning him with a gaze. She edged forward, inching toward him, deliberate intent in her eye. Her forehead pushed against his, forcing him down. He tried to speak, tried to protest. Failed utterly.

When the kunoichi finally spoke her words were little more than a growl; a furious hiss, threatening him with bodily_-and otherwise-_harm if he offended her further.

"Oi...Uzumaki...

"Ah...yes?"

"Is there a _fucking reason_ why you haven't moved?" She glared bloody red daggers.

"Because _you're_ on top of _me."_ Even as the words were leaving his mouth, Naruto was cursing himself. There was death in those brown eyes now. He deadpanned, glowering up at the former Oto kunoichi refuting what most might've called common sense. Perhaps it was his pride. Perhaps he was just being stubborn. Regardless, Naruto refusted to take back what he'd said.

Tayuya looked at him, hard, inscrutable. Her irises were brown but even as he looked on they shifted; white fading into black and brown flashing into gold; the effects of the cursed seal darkening her skin, sprouting the fearsom horns from before upon her head. He watched the transformation wind its way through her body; her already long locks lengthening further, her bosom pressing against his chest. Her entire body grew tense as he looked on, a predator, ready to pounce. She said nothing. Did nothing. Didn't even breathe.

"Are you goign to get the hell off or not?"

Tayuya surprised him, then.

She flushed.

"Y-You get off!"

"I _can't_ get off." Naruto snapped back, irritation breaking through his expression. "You're the one on top of me, bitch!"

Tayuya slapped him.

_Hard._

Naruto's head lolled backwards, ears ringing, his concsiousness dimming for an instant. Ouch! If he had to give it a rating out of ten, he'd have named the blow a solid twenty; ranking somewhere in the top three of his most painful blows of all time. Years of honed instinct kicked in; his body automatically rolling with the blow in an effort to absorb the worst of the damage. Unfortunately_-or perhaps fortunate-_in doing so he trapped the voluptuous redhead beneath him, their bodies colliding; welding together as one, briefly pressing the kunoichi to the damp earth. His velocity should've ended there.

It didn't.

* * *

><p>Jiraiya grinned from his vantage point in the trees above as the pair began to bicker.<p>

Oh, this was perfect. Absollutely perfect!

He'd been watching the pair all night after that little flute solo, hoping for more material after they'd fallen asleep. It had been a long, sleepless night. Butnow, it was about to pay off in spades. Because now, he'd been presented with the perfect opportunity. A sly and lecherous grin crept across his face as he observed their little quarrel, and then, by some miracle, the gods of ecchi and hentai decided to have his student roll atop the redhead, and whether by accident or design, straddling her.

_Just a little more!_ He silently willed his student onward, frowning when he came to an abrupt stop. _Just...a little...more..._

But to no avail.

Naruto lay there, frozen, all the momentum taken out of him. Jiraiya could feel the shock setting in, saw the furrowing of the kunoichi's brow. Within seconds, the perfect scene would be all but shattered. No! By all the gods of hentai and ecchi he refused to allow such a golden opportunity to pass them by! The fate of his latest novel: _Of Foxes and Turtles,_ depended upon it!

Cloaking himself in the transparency jutsu, the sanin crept down from his perch and toward his student. It was all he could do not to snicker as he oh-so-subtly nudged the boy forward, giving him that extra push he so desperately didn't want _or_ need. Satisfied with the boy's indignant sqwuak and the flush creeping up the kunoichi's neck, the Toad Sage strode back into the trees. He would watch and he would wait, taking notes as he garnered much needed material for his oh-so-precious novel. And if his apprentice should ever ask, he'd nothing to do with that kiss.

Because when it came to his research...

...nothing was sacred.

* * *

><p><em>(Back with Naruto)<em>

Something_-or someone-_pushed him from behind, jarring his face forward. He caught a shimmer in the air, little more than a translucent blur in his periphea visiol. Then he'd no more time for thought. Something soft an smooth touched his lips; something infinitely warm, tasting faintly of honeysuckle. He opened his mouth to protest, his lips parting to form the words to wonder what this was. Something touched his tongue. Something touched his tongue, pursued immediately thereafter by a muffled gasp from Tayuya. Oh no. _No no no no... _

_NO!_

Naruto's eyes were so wide that he half-worried they were going to fall right out of his head. Oh kami. He could see it in her eyes. Any chance he'd had of his surviving this debacle had gone out the window the moment his lips touched her own. Naruto jerked back as if he'd been _burned._ Because he'd kissed Tayuya.

Kissed! Her!

"W-Wha?" he gasped.

Naruto froze. His mind simply ceased to understand what he'd just done. He flung himself backwards all too late.

Tayuya's face turned as red as her hair, her pale cheeks darkening with a rush of bloody shame, embarassment, and rage. Oh yes, there was rage. So much rage that Naruto nearly missed out on the perverted cackling in the canopy above. Almost, but not quite. Before he could act however, stars_-whole planets, really-_imploded across his vision. He felt pain in nether region, pain that no man was meant to feel. And then she was upon him, driving him to the earth; striking him, raining blows down upon his face, uncaring as the jacket she wore flopped open at the chest, nearly exposing her ample bosom.

Naruto would've taken the time to appreciate it, were his life not on the line.

_"You fucking bastard!" _She shrieked down at him, fists flailing as she tried to claw out his eyes._ "How dare you! How fucking **DARE **you steal my first kiss! I'll send you to hell for that__!" _And she just might, at the rate he was getting battered. His lips were already cracked and swollen, and his

"Calm the hell down!"

_"Fuck you!"_

She smacked him a second time, harder than the last. Naruto winced; he was seriously _tired_ of being beaten. He hadn't enjoyed the pain when Sakura had done it, and he certainly didn't now. With each strike he felt it grow; his anger boiling to forefront as she continued to rail at him. Every blow compounded that anger, twisting it into a bitter hatred not his own. Concern crested over Naruto like a wave as the tide of crimson washed over his vision, boiling a this skin; because he was suddenly too tired to care.

"Would you kindly...

**...stop that!"** Blue eyes flashed red and slitted, his body surging with unholy chakra. His fist snapped upright like a pulley, slamming into the kunoichi's jaw. Tayuya managed only a muffled grunt before the blow sent her free from the earth and spiraling; her body slamming end over end before she finally came to rest, face in the ground, ass in the air. Naruto blinked, his anger vanishing with the morning mist as he looked on. None not a sound nor a breath came from her prone form. _Oh my god._ He gawped at the girl; at what he'd just done. She wasn't moving.

He shook himself off, his wounds having healed in the brief outburst of the kitsune's chakra.

"Oi," he stepped toward her, reached out a hand to jostle her shoulder, "...are you alright?"

Nothing.

He touched two fingers to her neck, dreading what he might find. No pulse.

**"Congrats, kit."** The bitter voice of the fox trickled into his ear, mocking him. **"Your first kill."**

The words hit him like a frozen fist in the stomach.

"I didn't want to kill her!"

**"You're welcome."**

Naruto stiffened at that. He'd killed someone, in cold blood. He'd taken a life.

_"Give her a moment, Naruto-sama." _Kamehime interrupted._ "She's merely unconcsious."_

**"Damn you, Isobue!"** Kyuubi hissed. **"I nearly had him full of despair! I nearly had my freedom!"**

_"You're welcome, sister. Ah!" _As if realizing her slip up, the Sanbi abruptly fell silent.

"Sister?" Naruto blinked and shook his head. Whatever else he might've thought vanished as a small pulse of green chakra spread from his hand and into Tayuya. The effect was as immediate as it was violent. The girl gave a great, heaving gasp, eyes snapping open, chest rising and falling rapidly. She looked up at Naruto, and growled, her golden eyes promising pain.

Naruto jerked his hand back as she sat up.

...the fuck was that?" Tayuya groaned, massaging her jaw. She looked at him strangely; there was still anger in her eyes but it was tempered somewhat, mirrored now with a newfound respect. "If you had that kind of power, then why didn't you use it from the beginning?"

"About that...

_"Nani?"_

He gestured at her.

"Would you _please_ get your clothes on?"

Naruto promptly clapped a hand over his eyes as she bolted upright, cheeks flaming.

"I-Its your fault!" She insisted, hurling the jacket at him. "You're the one who gave me this to wear!"

_"You're_ the one whose naked." Naruto pointed out, turning to face her. "How is that my-_ow!"_ He yelped as she poked his eyes out. Naruto yowled in pain and, without thinking, swung around. There was a loud, pained gasp from Tayuya, and when the jinchuuriki looked her way, she seemed to be holding back tears as she stuffed her fist in her mouth, the other clutching her clothes frantically before her body.

"Urusuai!" Tayuya screeched! "Don't look!"

"Sorry!" Naruto performed an about face, cheeks burning.

He waited until she was dressed, until he finally felt the killer intent abate. Only then did he dare to turn around; only then did he bring himself to face her. Her clothes were still slightly damp from the morning dew, but without that ugly ass cap, without the curse mark darkening her skin, she looked almost, well, normal.

"Oi, Uzumaki...

Shit! He'd been staring!

"Y-Yeah?"

_"I want to ask you something."_

Her hand graced his face then, the tan fingertips trailing ever-so-gently across his whiskered cheek. Naruto shuddered. What. The. Hell. What was she doing? Trying to seduce him? Lower his guard? Well it wasn't going to work! He was too strong for something like that! He was...he...he...he...

She leaned forward, eyes hooded.

"Well, isn't this a touching scene."

_"Geh!"_

Both teens jumped, the both of them, as Jiraiya materialized in a swirl of leaves. The Toad Sage was grinning from ear to ear as he observed their compromising position. And...kami, he looked tired... Heavy bags hung just beneath his eyes, indicitive of extreme sleep deprivation. As if that weren't enough, the sanin yawned, looking as though he might topple over at any minute. Tayuya's reaction was a great deal more profound than that of the blonde's. A muscle jumped in her jaw as her eyes narrowed, her entire body coiling as though it were a great spring.

"You were there all along, weren't you!" Naruto accused. "Ero-senin!"

"Ero...what?" Tayuya snorted aloud. "This guy's your sensei?"

"Nonsense!" Jiraiya scoffed, fighting back another yawn. "I just happened to be in the neighborhood!"

"Bullshit!"

"Now, is that any one to treat the one who'll be training the two of you?"

"T-T-T-Train?" Tayuya spluttered. "With you?" She cast a scathing glare at Naruto.

"Not my idea," the whiskered blond interrupted. "I didn't ask for you!" he amended, seeing her thunderous expression. "He's the one who said it, not me!"

"Figures." but the words were without rancor; lacking anger, bitterness, or anything of the sort. "First I get my ass dragged on this stupid fucking mission, then I get stuck with your ass." She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes.

"F-Fine!" She spat out. "Don't think I'll go easy on you!"

Naruto swallowed nervously.

Suddenly, he wasn't all that eager to train anymore...

**A/N:Poor Naruto! He just can't catch a break, can he? Well, I had to start his little makeup session with Tayuya eventually, and this was as good a time as any! I tried to make it as sincere-and humorous-as possible! I also hope you all get the hints for who will be in the harem so far, but eh, who knows? There may very well be more to come if Jiraiya and Kamehime have their way...but the next chapter will be pure LOL**

**The training continues next chapter, and then we get to see the Nanabi! Whatever might her fate be...**

**I'm still very pleased that this story seems to be a hit with most people. I also want to thank those readers who take the time to leave a review for the tale. They're very helpful in letting me know how the story is progressing with all of you. And they really do assist an author out in knowing what people like about a story. Thanks again to everyone for all of your support. ****As a small not to u, dear readers, Naruto is a bit more mature in this fic when it comes to romance. He's a growing boy! He has needs and, well, reacts differently to certain scene that he would've as a kid.**

**Tayuya: Like this one, where you had me half naked, wearing his jacket for hal the chapter?**

**NZ: Hey! The fans loved that!**

**Jiraiya: I know I did!**

**Tayuya:...can I kill him now?**

**NZ: No! Not yet! Here, why not take a look at this chappy then? It's a 'special' scene I cooked up for the two of you a few chapters down the road...**

**Tayuya: ...**

**NZ: Well, whadday think?**

**Tayuya: I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!**

**NZ: AH! Forgive me Tayuya-hime! I am not worthy of your greatness.**

**Tayuya: You're damn right your not, worm! Now, on your knees and bega for mercy!**

**R&R! =D**


	5. Of Feelings and Turtles

**A/N: Well, I'm happy to see that my female version of the Sanbi was so well received! And apparently everyone is glad to see Tayuya-chan alive and well. If she ends up in the harem Naruto will have his hands full, guaranteed! Now, as per request, the harem will ultimately go no higer than NINE at most. Any more than that and things will get seriously out of hand, and not even my unique brand of humor can deflect THAT much strain from our beloved blond. But to clarify, Sanbi! In. Guren! In! Tayuya! In? Fu? Maybe? So many women! So little time! Sorry I've been gone so long folks, but here I am! And...**

**...here's the next chapter! Warning! Extreme cuteness and _yuri_ in this chapter!**

_"Love me or hate me. I don't care. Seriously though...love me, alright?"_

_~Tayuya._

**Of Feelings and Turtles **

Tsunade was going to kill him.

Naruto deserved killing.

Fraternizing with the enemy! Socializing with a sycophant! He could already hear her accusations inside his head; filling him with dread at the thought of working with his former enemy. Honestly, how was he supposed to train let alone _trust_ someone who'd once tried to kill him in the past?! It was like mixing oil with water. Bad idea! And yet, there was nothing he could do about it. He'd been told to report to the training grounds first thing the next morning, so here they were, on their way.

_And then there's this one..._

His gaze drifted to Isobu, the biju's female form skipping happily beside him, her silver/scarlet tresses bouncing in the wind...alongside something else. Kami, did her breasts have to be that _big?_ Naruto clamped a hand over his nose in a vain attempt to stiffle the ensuing blood flow, but to no avail. He tore his gaze aside, wresting his visage away before she could catch him. Ah, but he underestimated the prowess of the one-eyed biju and her innate vison. She glanced at him askance, her visible eye fixating upon him, pinniong him with a gaze. A slow, sly smile crept across her face.

"Neh, Naruto-sama?"

"W-What?" He grumbled, refusing to look at her.

_"You were staring at my breasts again, weren't you?"_

The jinchuriki's face flared a fierce crimson color and he hastened his pace; to his dismay, his tenant matched him stride for stride. Godamnit shit! She'd caught him! He could feel her single eye boring into him while he walked, could see her lips pursed into a thin line, awaiting his answer. And what did Uzumaki Naruto do? Why, he did what any boy would do in such a situation.

_Lie!_

"I-I-I was not!" he denied, clinging to this answer like a lifeline. He half-expected the sinister sanbi to strike him down then and there in recompense for his temerity. Imagine his surprise, when she slowed to a crawl, a hairsbreadth later, coming to a complete stop behind him. Naruto made a small sound of surprise and reluctantly slowed as well, his body tense; ready to run at a moment's notice should his tenant try turn violent. She merely crooked one finger at him, beckoning. He approached, his throat thick with trepidation. She struck like a serpent, snaring his wrist in her fist. Guiding it to her bosom.

"Oi, what're you doing?!"

"Master...

Kamehime smiled and tugged at the bosomo of her kimono with her free hand, the thin fabric parting before her touch. She pushed his hand into her chest; the fabric was so thin it may as well not even been there. He balked, Naruto did, baffled by her behaviour. She peered up at him beneath her lashes, batting them at him.

"If you want to look that badly, you might as well _touch_ them...

_Gah!_

Naruto's head snapped backwards as though he'd been struck, blood spurting from his nostrils. Despite all protestation, he was still a man, and men had their weaknesses.

**"Squeeze them and I'll tear your feeaking head off!"** A darkened voice growled in his head. Naruto flinched as though he'd been struck. _Scary! _The malice in the Kyuubi's tone was practically palpable; a vertiable force of nature the like of which he'd never known. And yet...Despite himself, Uzumaki Naruto, did the unthinkable. He squeezed. Isobu whimpered; a small moue of pleasure fleeing her lips as his fingers closed on the tender flesh of her left breast, her single eye slidng shut in ecstasy.

"Naruto-sama...you're so ecchi!"

A low growl reverberated in the corners of his mind. Naruto flinched anew. Why the devil did the fox care what he did?

**"So that's the way you want to play, eh, boy? See what happens next time you need my chakra!"**

"That wasn't intentional!" he gasped out, more to himself than the voice in his head, than the woman standing before him. Kamehime simply smiled; she was perfectly aware of the snarling kitsune in her master's head, of the deadly threat said fox had just issued. Everything was proceeding according to her plan. She would draw her _Onee-sama_ out. Little by little she would turn the tables to their advantage, until her elder sibling was finally willing to both recognize and accept the superiority of Naruto-sama. If that meant she had to ruffle the kitsune's fur then...well, so be it.

"Whatever you say, master...

"Then I say we get going!" Face flaming and blissfully unaware of the plans his newest tenant had in store for him, the gening tore his hand away and his head aside. He silently resolved never to do fall for such trickery again. Never again, no matter the temptation. Kamehime's breasts had been so soft, though...soft and pliable and so very warm. Oh kami! Oh dear kami preserve him! He'd long since suspected it, but now he knew for certain; Isobu was turning him into a pervert! It was true! But now, it was more than that.

Ever since she'd kissed him, _and _led him to Tayuya in the same night, he'd begun to suspect Kamehime of something more than mere mischief. The Sanbi, seemed to be making every effort to force him to interact with the opposite sex, including herself. _Strange_, he thought to himself, It was almost as if she were trying to create his own personal harem_...nah._ What possible interest could a Biju have in that? He carefully ignored those thoughts, plugged his bloody nose, and returned his attention to the empty streets, deserted at this early hour of the morn.

If the Sanbi at all sensed his mood, she did little to comment on it. She merely slipped an arm within his content to walk beside him as she always had. He'd all but given up on telling her not to hold his arm; she would do as she pleased and there was nothing he could do to stop her. That didn't mean he wasn't about to try. After all, Uzumaki Naruto was nothing if not stubborn. He was dimly aware of her speaking; relating to him the time she'd spent with Yukimaru and Guren while he'd slept. _That_ got his attention. He knew the sanbi was able to venture out on whenever she pleased but he hadn't thought she'd leave the seal merely on a whim. Too much information! He didn't even want to think of the chaos she could've caused while he slumbered!

"Wait, you did _what_ with them?" The blond balked, unable to believe his ears

"We sang kaoroke!" Kamehime chirruped.

_...ha?"_

"You really should have been there when everyone else did it." she finished with a laugh, skipping along beside him as they exited the marketing district. "It was so much fun!" Naruto grunted again, refusing to alter his disposition_-or pace-_on the topic. As soon as this Nanabi business was over he planned to have a strong word with Tsunade baa-chan. These women were driving him to distraction!

"Don't worry, Master." Kamehime soothed, mistaking his silence for tension, "Once we finish her training, I'm sure we can covince Tay-chan to follow you wherever you go."

"Like I'd want anything to do with her!" The blond groused. "Although...

"Although?"

The blond flushed and shook his head.

"N-Nevermind!"

"You liiiiiiike her." Kamehime purred, releasing his arm with a grin.

"I do not!"

"You like her!" She pranced around him, laughing as the genin's ire soared to incredble heights. "You liiiiiike her! Master liiiiikes Tay-chan! Master liiiiikes Tay-chan! He likes-_Gah!"_

"Stop rolling your tongue, baka kame!" Naruto chastised, bopping his biju on the head. "You're not a cat!" Kamehime whimpered in pain, rubbing at the rising welt on her head. Naruto glowered at her a moment longer, refusing to relent in his anger. He most certainly did not like that foul-mouthed redhead...alright maybe a little. Perhaps a tad. It probably had something to do with being an Uzumaki! But that didn't mean anything! He didn't care whether or not it was in his genes, he still abhored the concept of working alongside a former enemy. Kamehime certainly wasn't helping matters any with her incessant teasing.

"You're_-snifle-_so mean master...

"Oh come on!" Naruto groaned. "I know for a fact that didn't hurt you!"

Kamehime continued to snifle at his feet, seeking her partner's sympathy.

"So mean...

At last, Naruto reluctantly reached down to pat his partners her head, tousling her tresses affectionately. "Look, I didn't mean to hit ya, alright?" It was like trying to stem a leaky dam with tissue paper. It simply wasn't going to happen. Or so he thought. Kamehime suddenly smiled beneath his touch-a smile he knew and recognized, all too well. Even as he took a step backwards she lunged _upwards,_ eyes glinting. Before Naruto could think _-hope-_ to stop the sanbii, he found his lips caged between hers for the second time in less than a week, her tongue tasting his. She skipped backwards even as his mouth dropped open, lips forming a wide oval of shock and surprise. The sanbi touched a hand to her mouth and visibly shuddered with delight.

"Mmm... I take it back!" She grinned, licking her lips laviciously. "You're much too niiiiiice to me ...

"I _told_ you to stop rolling your tongue!" Naruto growled, dabbing at his mouth with his sleeve in an effort to dry the saliva from his cheeks. "You aren't a cat!"

The sanbi held up a single finger.

"But Mata-nii is...

_"Aaargh!"_

"That's the spirit master!" Kamehime pumped a fist in the air, her spirit suddenly restored. "Fight!"

"Urusai!" he barked back, "No more kissing me today!"

"Hai!" The young woman chirruped, her mood never faltering for a moment. "Whatever you say, my master! But..."

"But?"

_"What about tomorrow?"_

Naruto face-vaulted.

Honestly he didn't know whether to laugh or to cry when it came to Kamehime. Her loyalty to him was contstant and utterly unwavering but at times, she took things to the extreme. Including the kissing. Especially the kissing! Naruto glared at her, hoping to impart some sense of his anger unto his tenant. She stared back at him without any sort of guille; her gaze lacking anger or sorrow; there was only pure bliss and adoration to be found in her expression and he hated her for it. Kami, he just couldn't stay mad at this one! Her words certainly didn't help him!

"Ah, Naruto-sama...I'm so glad you're my master!" She nuzzled her head into his neck and purred like a contented kitten. "So much better than other jinchuriki...

"Hai hai, keep moving." Naruto sighed, ushering her onward like an errant child. He touched a finger to his chin in thought as they moved.

_Other jinchuuriki...huh._

Ideas were flowing through him now, coalescing, starting to make sense. He'd never taken the time to really think about them before, the other jinchuriki. Or maybe his perception of himself had been blocked. His true self. Such blockage could be removed by all kinds of things, he realized. Drugs, diet, environment. An emotional crisis perhaps. Regardless, he found himself seriously contemplating the matter further. What were other Jinchuriki like? Gaara was the only one he'd met, andback then the poor boy had been batshit crazy from lack of sleep. Were the others like that? He'd never met them. What where they like?

He knew there each biju had a different number of tails, one for Shukkaku and nine for Kyuubi. Tails Nibi through Hachibi_-excluding Isobu-_were virtually unknown to him. They and their jinchuuriki might be vicsious and cruel; bloodthirsty beasts who cared naught but for destruction. They could also be misunderstood, not wanting nor needing the powers that had been thrust upon them. He had no way of knowing. And yet...somethiing nagged at him, prickling at the edge of his thoughts, coupled by Kyuubi's earlier words.

**"You know nothing of our true power."**

Naruto was on the verge of an epitome; he just knew it, he only needed a few more seconds...

"Nice of you to join us, asshole."

_...lost it._

The blonde's head snapped up, suddenly aware that the streets of Konoha were long behind them. Somewhere in his musings his feet had carried him to his destination, and now the grand realization was gone, his idea eviscerated; thoughts slipping through his fingers like so much water. He glared bloody red daggers at her and she at him.

Gone was the redhead's prison garb; in its place was something else altogether. A simple black skirt and a crimson blouse had replaced the tattered leggings she'd once worn and that ugly cap she used to wear was likewise nowhere to be seen. Not even a hint of her old Otogakure attire remained. She looked as though she'd received a bath since he'd seen her last, or perhaps it had been her dip in the lake last night; because there was not so much as a single speck of grime to be seen upon her body. Her hair was bound behind her back in a long ponytail, a few stray strands framing her stern auburn eyes. Were it not for the collar round her neck, he'd have though she'd been set free.

Even with it...she was almost..._cute._

"Yo." He waved loosely, ruthlessly biting off the word "you!", before it became an accusation. Now was not the time for anger, he reminded himself. That came later. Once they finished their training and this mission, he could become as angry as he pleased. Until then, he'd just have to bear with it.

"S'up." Tayuya planted a hand upon her hip, her gaze slipping across the boy, to his biju. "Sooo...whose the chick? Friend of yours?"

"This is...Isobu." Naruto had no desire to reveal that she was the sanbi. The situation between them remained still volatile; a keg of dynamite that needed only a single spark to ignite. And he had no desire to strike the first spark. He stole a glance at his partner out of the corner of his eye, and tried to impress upon her the meaning of silence. It was like talking to a wall.

"Moh, master!" She pouted. "I told you to call me Kamehime!"

"You can call her that, too." Naruto sighed.

Kamehime merely waved.

Tayuya arched an eyebrow.

"Whatever you say, buddy." She shrugged. "So, is she just here to watch, or what?" Naruto blanched in the same instant that Kamehime frowned; her normal cheery disposition wiped out by the implied insult. She was not the sort to stand idly by when someone questioned her ability to fight. He knew that for a fact. But Tayuya knew naught, and she remained blissfully ignorant, unaware as the human manifestation of the biju took a small, singular step forward, her hand sliding to the hook-shaped handle of her weapon, touching it, yet not drawing its deadly edge.

"I am here to train as well." Isobu replied softly, her single eye narrowing to a deadly slit. "Unlike you, I do not rely upon _tools_ to win my battles." The fierce and flush of Tayuya's face was like a searing fire, obliterating any and all semblance of calm. She stepped forwad as well, clutching at her flute in anticipation.

"The fuck was that, bitch?!"

"Ara, did I stutter?"

"I'll kill you!"

"I seriously doubt that." The sanbi twirled a silver/scarlet strand in her finger. "And even if you did, I'd simply reincarnate."

"Why you-

Kamehime said nothing more, but she struck like a serpent. One moment her tails were coiled tight beneath her kimono; against her backside, out of sight, out of mind. The next they surged forward in a blur, wrapping around Tayuya's legs like a pair of vipers. The kuonichi had just enough time to loose a small peep of surprise then she was hauled skyward; left dangling yards above the training field, helpless to extricate herself from the trap into which she'd fallen.

"W-W-W-What the hell is this?!" Tayuya yelped, struggling to push her skirt down-erm..._up_ as she struggled to free herself. "Put me down you crazy bitch! Lemme go!"

"Not until you apologize." Isobu chastised.

"Wha-Hell no!"

_"Kukuku...as you wish." _Kamehime grinned, and next to the Kyuubi, it was the singular scariest thing Naruto had ever seen in his life. The sanbi's third tail, unused, until this very moment, descended mercilessly upon Tayuya's skirt and lifted it, parting the black fabric down and aside to reveal the redhead's long legs, and a flash of crimson between them. Naruto clutched at his nose and hastiily averted his gaze. He would surely die of blood loss at this rate! But it might be worth it...

"Ara, so you're wearing red panties today?"

Tayuya's subsuquent shriek sent birds screaming for the trees.

"PUT ME DOWN NOW!"

* * *

><p>Deep within the sanctity of the trees, Jiraiya of the sanin clutched at his nose with one hand, and hastily scribbled upon his notepad with the other. He'd decided to be "unavoidably late" for a second time, merely to see what the blonde's reaction would be once he encountered Tayuya again. Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined he'd bear witness to a catfight between her and the sanbi! And when the sanbi dragged the redhead off the ground and began to embarass the living daylights out of her by showing her panties...brilliant!<p>

Combined with the scintillating notes he'd made while tailing his only disciple on the way here _Of Foxes and Turtles_ would be a hit beyond any other! Maybe he ought to separate them before they hurt each other-rather before the sanbi broke the human girl in half. He placed his hands together and prepared to appear in grandiose fashion, drew on his chakra...

...and then he heard it.

"Wha-hey! S-Stop that! Th-That...

In a heartbeat, his pen was back in hand.

"I suppose I should stop them...

He stifled a perverted giggle.

...but this is too good to miss!"

* * *

><p><em>"Stop!"<em> Tayuya half-begged, half-laughed, writhing and squirming as the Sanbi mercilessly tormented her, supple fingertips dancing across her flat stomach. "I'm dying here!" Mere moments before, Naruto's biju had devised a new method of torture for the impertinent redhead; lowering her just so, allowing her long arms to reach the kunoichi's midriff without fear of retaliation. Now, Uzumaki Naruto looked on aghast, wanting to stop them yet unable to tear his gaze away, as Isobu ruthlessly tickled the once fearsome shinobi to the point of no return; mirthful tears streaming between her lashes.

"What's the magic word?" Isobu grinned, briefly relenting in her assault.

Tayuya sulked a moment longer, gasping for breath.

"Please?" She rasped out.

"I. Can't. Hear. You!"

"PLEASE!"

"That wasn't so hard now, was it?" Kamehime complied, dropping the redhead on her arse. Tayuya collapsed in a heap. "Now apologize to Naruto-sama, and we'll call it even."

"Cheeky dickwaffle." The redhead grumbled at the blond.

"The hell was that?!"

So much for bearing with it!

"Hai hai, that's enough, kiddies." Jiraiya's voice caused both teens to come about, heads snapping back and forth like puppets severed from their strings. The saniin appeared in a swirl of leaves, effectively ending what might've been the arguement of the year. "Now that we're all here, why don't we cut straight to the chase?" Tayuya _hmphed_ and turned aside, arms folded before her bosom. "Unless...you have something to say?" The sanin left the question dangling before her face like a carrot, and sure enough, she bit down.

_Hard._

"Fuck you!" The redhead spat, flipping him off. "You were watching the whole time, weren't you?!"

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Jiraiya lied as though it were second nature to him. "But you make an excellent point. You probably don't feel like training at all now, do you?"

Tayuya's silence spoke volumes.

"How about we leave the two of them alone for awhile, gaki?" Jiraiya suggested of his apprentice. "Let 'em work out their differences?"

By the look on Naruto's, face he wasn't sure this was the best course of action. These two were just as likely to kill one another rather than work out their differences. He opened his mouth to voice that very opinion, to remind his sensei that this was not a good idea-

"I'll even give you a few pointers for that new technique of yours..

It was like flicking a switch.

"Have fun girls!"

* * *

><p><em>(Some hours later)<em>

"How long are you going to sit there and sulk?" Kamehime asked. She looked up, from where she sat, peering across the grounds at Tayuya; the redhead had refused to budge since Jiraiya-sama took Naruto to an adjacent training ground to complete his training on a new jutsu. Kamehime knew exactly what said technique was, and whille she could've given her master much better instruction than the sanin, she'd chosen to feign ignorance and allow the boys to take take their leave so that she might remain here with the foul-mouthed redhead; one of the greatest hurdles to her harem plan for Naruto-sama. She would not break easily, this one. But Kamehime was nothing if not stubborn.

"I said-

Tayuya turned her head and spat.

"As long as I fucking feel like it!" She refused to speak to this woman! Especially after all she'd put her through.

"Behavior like that will get you nowhere." Kamehime chided, taking a comb to her hair. Provoking the spitfire had its merits, but she couldn't push too far. She had to let the kunoichi come to her first, and then through her, to Naruto-sama. She had to present a sympathetic face...no matter how much she enjoyed riling the redhead.

"Again...fuck you!"

Abrupt laughter trickled through the trees; sweet and joyous. Not Kamehime's but Naruto's. Both women hazarded a glance toward the trees.

"Seems like he's finally gotten a handle on the jutsu." Isobu smiled softly. She rose in one smooth movement from where she lay, crossing the distance between them in long, swift strides toward Tayuya. The redhead grimaced when she sat beside her, but made no effort to push her away. "I didn't think he'd be able to use it this soon."

"Yeah, the sooner he can kill me with it." sneered Tayuya.

Another laugh came from the clearing beyond, closer now. A breeze burst through the trees. A monsoon of chakra squeezed through their branches. Whatever technique the blond had been working on, it would appear he'd finally attained some semblance of control over it, if not outright mastery. Tayuya's expression softened when she heard his laughter. Her eyes sought Isobu's and, with them, asked a question.

"He _could've_ killed you, already." The sanbi said. "Last night. You were vulnerable."

"But he didn't." Tayuya said, eyes narrowing.

"Exactly."

Kamehime saw Tayuya's resolve begin to erode.

"He rather likes the sound of your flute." She continued. "It's all he thinks about."

Pink burnished the kunoichi's cheeks.

"A-And how do you know about that?"

"Ara, how indeed?" Kamehime smiled. Should she reveal herself as a biju, the poor girl would probably go into shock. "Naruto-sama and I are very...close."

"How close?"

"As close as the two of you could be, someday." she prodded.

"As if! He's still hung up on that Uchiha brat; still thinks he can save his friend." She scoffed, shaking her head. "But he can't. I saw the look in his eyes that night; he was only thinking about himself. Trust me, by now there's probably nothing left to save. Gaki's just too dense to see it."

"Naruto-sama's not that dense," Isobu said, knocking the last bricks out of the wall of Tayuya's resistance. "He's just...stubborn. After all that happened to him, can you really blame him for that?"

"He's stil an ass." Tayuya grumbled.

"As are you."

Tayuya opened her mouth to retort, but seemed to think better of it.

"Alright...he's not...all bad, ya know?" Her words were soft; even Kamehime had to strain to hear them. "He was the first person to listen to my music without being forced. But now...whenever I look at him_...aargh!_ He just pisses me off! B-But its not like I care about him, or anything!" She scrabbled at her head with both hands, as though she could somehow tear these treacherous thoughts from her mind. Isobu chortled softly at the sight, eliciting a venemous glare from her fellow kunoichi.

"What the hell's so funny?!"

"You like him." She prodded the redhead in the chest with a finger. "Naruto-sama, I mean."

Tayuya bolted to her feet.

"I do not!"

"There's no use lying to me." Isobu chuckled. "They call it a love/hate relationship. Besides, I'm sure he could come to forgive you, in time-

"Bah!" Tayuya was quivering now. "Like I need his forgiveness!"

There was a silence.

_"You do, don't you?"_

_**"SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP!"** _Tayuya reached for her flute, and Kamehime drew on her chakra to resist the genjutsu that was sure to come. _"Shut up shut up shut up!"_ Her lips trembled, even as she pressed them to the flute. No melody came forth and no sound was produced. Their was only the wind, and the sound of the nearly finished jutsu in the next clearing over. The flute fell from her fingers, clattered to the ground. Kamehime said nothing; sternly sustaining her silent vigil. Tears dangled like dew at the edge of Tayuya's lashes, stubborn and refusing to fall.

"You...don't know what you're asking." the redhead said, fear causing her voice to shake. "You don't know shit, you hear me?!" Anger colored her words, staining them with sorrow. "You don't know shit!" She sagged to the floor and Kamehime released her hold on the chakra and went to her, pulling her close and holding her tight. Tayuya did not resist. She buried her face in her bosom as the biju stroked at her hair, whispering words of contrition and comfort, ruthlessly restraining the shiver she felt with the girl's face between her breasts.

"It's alright, little one." She soothed. "It's all alright."

"No, it won't." The redhead sobbed.

"Yes, it will."

"Why do you keep saying that?" Tayuya mumbled into the woman's chest. Kamehime supresed another shiver, her arms moving below the younger girl's back. It simply wouldn't do for her to lose control of herself now and here, of all places. Easier said than done. She could feel herself slipping slowly but surely. There was just something so insufferably _adorable_ about the redhead when she let her walls down so..._damnably cute!_ The words were thick in her throat when she spoke, but by no means forced.

"Because I know it to be true." of course she knew; everything was proceeding according to her plans. Everything...except the kunoichi in her arms. Isobu hadn't expected feelings to develop for the girl so suddenly nor so soon. She was utterly loyal to Naruto-sama in every say, and yet she couldn't quite help the stirring of affection she felt in her breast, as Tayuya cleaved to her, fingers fisting at the edges of her kimono. She wanted this one. Not just for her master, but herself as well. The realization surprised her, overwhelmed her. She felt Tayuya stir against her once more, reluctantly releasing the hold she had upon the fabric of her attire.

"What was your name again?" she whispered.

_"Isobu."_

Tayuya slowly pulled herself from the biju's bossom, scrubbing at her eyes with the back of her hand. She smiled, not all jagged edges as before, but softly, nervous.

"You know what...you're not so bad yourself."

"Is that so?" the biju couldn't quite help the hint of challenge that entered her words. "And just what is it that makes me "not so bad" I wonder, hmm?"

Tayuya flushed, mumbled something beneath her breath. Leaned forward, until their foreheads were touching.

"Beg your pardon?"

_...I said...because you're turning me on.__"_

Kamehime blinked as something warm and infinitely yielding crushed against her mouth. It was fleeting, swift. She blinked her surprise. Touched a hand to her lips.

"Oh."

"Don't tell anyone." Tayuya mumbled, lowering her gaze. "If you do, I swear I'll play you a melody that'll make your ears rot!"

"I wouldn't dream of it, my dear." Kamehime smiled softly and patted the redhead on the the back. Another one down! And an interesting attraction developed in the process.

"Um...Why are the two of you hugging?"

Kamehime did her best to restrain the small smile that threatened to overcome her face. She'd been so caught up in her newest attraction she'd failed to sense her master's approach. She felt the redhead bristle in her arms, hazel eyes flying wide open, every muscle alert and on edge. She flung herself to the south, scrabbling backwards like a drunken crab at the approach of student and master. Kamehime did not fail to miss the all but beatific grin adjourning Jiraiya-sama's face; a gleeful grin that seemed to wreathe his every feature.

"Did I miss something here?" Naruto asked, looking around at everyone.

"Urusai!" Tayuya launched herself upright, face flaming. "Baka! Naruto no baka!"

"Eh?!" Naruto blanched at her sudden vehemence. "What the hell did I do?!"

"You ruined the moment, asshole!"

Isobu could no longer help herself; she laughed then; it was a soft, melodious sound, comparable to wind chimes in the breeze.

"Oh, Naruto-sama, you really do baffle me sometimes...

_Just like that, the months flew by in a blue blur. Time passed. Training commenced and ended. And then..._

**_...it was time._**

**A/N: Aaaaw, Kamehime's cracked Tayuya's shell! It took less effort than I thought, she just needed a sympathetic face, one that didn't piss her off on sight. Which brings me to my next piece of news: I need a vote! Should Fu live? Or should she die? I already have plans for the Nanabi, but Fu's still up in the air at present. I have absolutely no idea what to do about her, and yet I do not want to write her off without cause. So, my esteemed readers, I ask you, what should her fate be? Life or death?**

**The mission with the Nanabi officially begins next chapter, and its already half-written, so hurry! I decided it would be best to devote a full chapter to what's about to happen. I sincerely hope you enjoyed this one!**

**I'm still very pleased that this story seems to be a hit with most people. I also want to thank those readers who take the time to leave a review for the tale. They're very helpful in letting me know how the story is progressing with all of you. And they really do assist an author out in knowing what people like about a story. Thanks again to everyone for all of your support. ****As a small not to u, dear readers, Naruto is a bit more mature in this fic when it comes to romance. He's a growing boy! He has needs and, well, reacts differently to certain scenes than he would've as a kid.**

**So...in the immortal words of Atlas...**

**...Review, would you kindly? I shall even provide a preview!**

_"Onee-sama, if you'd just listen to master-_

_Chomei bared her fangs in a feral hiss._

_"He is not my master! No one is my master! Not him! Not the Akatsuki! Not anyone!"_

**R&R! =D**


	6. Of Love and Turtles

**A/N: I return once again! As I'm sure you've all noticed, I've been on one helluva updating spree as of late, let my imagination run wild as I see fit. Originally, I had intented to update this story much sooner, but my computer crashed and I lost EVERYTHING. Thus, I was forced to recreate this chapter from scratch as well as several others. My only regret is that I wasn't able to get it to ya'll sooner. That, and I haven't gotten all that many reviews for the latest chapter of "Vanguard of Shinobi." But hey, you win some and ya lose some! You didn't come here for that! You came for the next chapter! And I'm proud to present it! So, without further adue, I present you with...**

**...THE NEXT CHAPTER OF FOXES AND TURTLES!**

_"We shall serve no master!"_

_~Choumei!_

**Of Love and Turtles**

_"You shall not have us!"_

Blue eyes burst open with a startled hiss, his body lurching upwards to kick at the covers in a furious flurry of motion, before he finally realized he'd been dreaming. He sat there for a moment, drenched in a cold sweat, trembling from head to toe as he the world slowly came back to him. He wasn't in that god-awful swamp anymore, but his room. The sounds of crickets greeted his ears, a glance at his window confirmed that the skies were just now beginning to brighten, tongues of fire scrawling their way across the horizon to signal the break of dawn.

_Just a dream, he_ told himself for what must've been the upteenth time.

Slowly-tentatively-Uzumaki Naruto shrugged off the last vestiges of his nightmare, willing strength back into his numbed limbs. It felt as though everything had been plunged into icy cold water; forcing him to wait for a small eterinity before finally being able to move. That damned dream again. When would it end? What did it mean? He didn't know. It had plagued him for nearly a week now and still he hadn't been able to make heads nor tails of it. Whenever he closed his eyes at night its was there, speaking to him, communicating, tell him go away, to leave well enough alone...ugh. Resolving himself to wakefulness, the blond tossed his head back upon the pillows and began to ponder.

In hindsight, everyone had hoped that the month would last a little longer. But here it was, and there was nothing more they could do about it.

He had trained for this day as hard as he could, pushing his mind and body to their absolute limits. He'd even discovered a new jutsu with Jiraiya's help within the month. Rasenshuriken. Amazing what the application of a thousand shadow clones could help you learn in the span of a few days. Unbeknownst to the others-even to Tsunade and Sakura-the sannin had taught the blond something else something he'd only recently begun to get any sort of handle on. His mother's sealing techniques. Or to be more apt, Kushina's techniques. To know you had parents was one thing.

To actually have a name to put to a face was something else entirely, he thought staring up at the ceiling of his bedroom. Having woken early-unable to sleep more than four hours the night before-the blond found that he was almost...reluctant to start in on this mission. He had a bad feeling about this. A terrible, awful feeling that something was going to happen. But what? What could possibly go wrong, after having a full four weeks to prepare himself, thanks in part to Jiraiya?

The old pervert had only divulged his mother's however-if he knew who his father was, and the blond suspected he did, he wouldn't be coughing it up anytime soon. And, in the subtle arts of seals, Naruto was only sub-par to adequate at the very best. He could seal items into scrolls without any real sort of difficulty but when it came to sealing moving objects such as weapons or-kami forbid-_people_ he could only do so with Isobu's aid and even then only for short periods of time. Entrapping actual elements such as fire and water and utilizing them during battle was out of the question; he either ended up sopping wet or on fire-much to the snickering bemusement of his godfather.

He could utilizie Kamehime's chakra shroud at will without suffering those...unfortunate side effects too often now. Even now he shuddered at the thought of it. They'd discovered the hard way that drawing upon Isobu's chakra shroud didn't just lend him her outward female body but in rare cases actually _trapped_ him in that form until the biju'd exhausted her chakra. Jiraiya-pervert!-theorized it was some small amount of holdover that caused the unwanted transformation, a residual effect that would fade with time. Naruto certainly hoped so. Being trapped in a female body -even if he'd shortened that time to only a few minutes-was very..._distressing_ to say the least.

But putting his techniques and training aside, he felt he was ready for this. He'd done all he said and could possibly do in the last month. He'd simply run out of time. Once more his mind drifted back to the mission only hours away, waiting for him with the rising of the sun. He knew his assigned task, he was there to help suppress the Nanabi should it get out control; evidently he'd been deemed the powerhouse for this assignment. A simple role to be sure, one he was certain he could fuill.

Shikamaru would be the leader of course, being a chunin. Naruto didn't begrudge him that. One day, _one day,_ he too would share that rank and then, then he'd be able to lead his own missions. But for Then there was Kakashi, Yamato, Shizune, Guren, Sakura, Hinata and himself. Tayuya made nine. Ten if you counted Isobu. So in reality, were basically going into this with three groups of three a part of it as well. If they had but two more they could've have a fourth group...but ah, well.

Tsking-the blond rose from his bed, berating himself for such thoughts. Time to rise and shine and rouse the old girl. At his own behest, and quite a bit of funding on Tsunade's part, he and Kamehime had moved into a much larger, two-bedroom apartment. No longer did they share a bed but rather, slept in separate rooms. The Biiju herself had become quite taken with the idea of human form over the last twenty-eight days now able to sustain and maintain her physical appearance for at least a solid week without the exhaustion to which she was so prone. And then someone decided it was a wise idea to have Tayuya move in. His apathy for her had cooled considerably by that point, but even so, he'd expected sharing an apartment with her would prove more...troublesome.

That, and Kamehime.

Naruto almost missed her nightly sojourns, but he had to admit, he slept much better without the thoughts of his lovely partner ever on his mind. Kurama was still a stain on his thoughts, but despite the drawbacks, he found himself much rather willing to risk embarassment by wielding _Isobu's_ powers rather than the complete and utter carnage promised at the hands of his bloodthirsty kitsune. They'd have to deal with the old fox one of these days he was sure, but hestill liked to think said day was of reckoning was in the far and distant future.

Yes, our favorite jinchuuriki thought to himself as his hand closed around the door's handle leading to his tenant's room-things had been looking up since the biiju had entered his life. Knocking once, receiving a muffled assent and withou thinking, he swung it open. It was just second nature to him. He didn't even give a single thought as to what might lay beyond...

**_"The hell?!"_**

Aaaaaaand was nearly expelled from the room by the sheer force of his nosebleed.

Naruto's unusual relationship with Tayuya hadn't soured any over the last month-if anything, it had improved rapidly. They'd advanced rapidly, progressing from tentative steps toward actual friendship, to something _more._ But he wasn't the only one who'd gotten closer to the rehead. Now, as he looked on and struggled to staunch his bleeding nose, he was once more reminded_...just how unpredictable his newest tenant could be when he left her alone. _Under any other circumstance, he wouldn't have been all that surprised to see his tenant frolicking with the redhead; she seemed intent on drawing his fellow Uzumaki-who'd have thought?-out of her shell once and for all. But this...

...this crossed a line he hadn't even known to _exist._

Tayuya's face was as red as her hair, perhaps moreso, her body squirming relentlessly against the bed and beneath the biju in a vain attempt to escape both the blonde's gaze and the girl entrapping her. That in and of itself wasn't too bad, nor was it all that damning. Kamehime was well known for her overenthusiastic displays of affection. When one considered their stark lack of clothing however, as well as the compromising position in which he'd found them well...one's imagination took over from there. It was like staring at paradise...

"I-Its not what it looks like, idiot!" the redhead sputtered! "She was just giving me a massage!"

"At six in the morning." Naruto's deadpann was barely concealed; the sheer incredulity of what he'd just witnessed causing his own discretion to momentarily overtaking his inner pervert. "With her lips?" He didn't know whether to laugh out loud or to die from blood loss. He was beginning to lean toward the latter. Idly he noticed that Kamehime had perfect her henge, she looked almost human now, with two eyes and the succinct lack of those three tails. Where it not for her silver-scarlet hair, and grey-colored eyes, he'd never have recognized her...

"I didn't ask her for this, I swear!"

"Ara, that's not what you said last night." Isobu purred, breaking the stalemate. "If I recall, you were practically begging me for-

Tayuya's squeak was possibly the most adorable thing he'd ever heard.

"U-Urusai!"

"Come now, there's nothing to be ashamed of." Kamehime merely laughed and snuggled ever closer to her second-favorite Uzumaki. In the last month the three of them _had_ grown incredibly close...but this..._this_ was a new low, even for the Sanbi. In ways even he hadn't expected. That still didn't make it any easier to stop staring when he walked in on them, however!

"Yeah," the blonde drawled, "I'm probably going to regret this, but I think Imma just turn around, and walk away now...

"Ara?" the voice at his back sent silent chills shooting up his spine. "You're welcome to join us, Naruto-sama. I'm sure Tayuya-chan wouldn't mind."

"H-Hey!"

Despite the ever-increasing temptation, Naruto shook his head.

"No, thank you-

"He's ignoring us, isn't he?" Tayuya's voice froze him in his tracks, her offended tone rooting him in place. Naruto didn't understand the reason for this sudden shift, but, he immediately recognized that the conversation had taken an unpleasant turn. One he'd been hoping to avoid. "What's the matter, dumbass? Are we still not good enough for you?" Naruto opened his mouth to reply-

Apparent, the Sanbi decided now was a good time to broach the subject. "Are you being stubborn?"

"No," Naruto inched backwards, knowing this fight was futile, yet struggling all the same. "I'm not. Its just, now isn't the best time and we have a mission at sunrise...

"He _is_ being stubborn." Kamehime decided, ignoring his protests.

"Can't have that now, can we?" Tayuya agreed with a devious look.

"No, we can't." The biju rose to make room for the redhead.

"Ladies, please...I just woke up-

He was cut off as Tayuya's mouth struck his, her lips connecting with his ferociously.

Perhaps it was the stress. Perhaps it was the fact that he had two naked women in front of him. Perhaps it was her one hand on the back of his neck, pulling his mouth closer to hers, while the other started undoing his belt. Whatever the reason, Uzumaki Naruto forgot about why he shouldn't be doing this _completely_ as Tayuya grabbed hold of him underneath his pants.

Her gasp of surprise certainly did not dissuade him either.

"Now now, Tayuya-chan," Isobu's voice chided from somewhere behind them, "That's not fair, hogging Naruto-sama like that."

A pair of hands grabbed him from behind, cutting off whatever he might've said...

_...before dragging him back to the bed._

* * *

><p>Naruto was still flushing when they finally reached the gates nearly an hour later. Although, he wasn't nearly so crimson as Tayuya. It was almost perversely pleasing to know he wasn't the only one still startled by that legendary Uzumaki stamina. It had been enlightening to say the least or it <em>would've<em> been if it hadn't been their first time. One could not expect to share an apartment with two redheads and hold onto one's virginity for very long. Still, who would've thought Isobu could prove so...flexible? Or Tayuya so submissive when it came to sex, instead of outright demanding? If the last month with Ero-senin hadn't already corrupted his naivete, then these two were making short work of his residual resitance.

It certainly didn't help that the latter was still clinging

"Mmhmm," Kamehime murmurred as she kissed his neck gently whilst they walked, slowly working her way up to his ear. She brought her mouth up there whispered softly, her voice little more than a seductive caress upon his outer lobe, "You're getting better at this, Naruto-sama, that you are."

"Hey!" Tauya tugged her back towards her. "No fair! We agreed to _share_, remember?"

"And we _are_ sharing." the biju said pointedly. "You have one arm, I have the other. I'd say that's quite fair."

Naruto growled. "Will the two of you cut it out?"

Ironically, they were not the first to arrive.

Nay, there was someone already there waiting for them-his bright, green spandex suit identifying him almost before they were even within earshot. Despite himself and the soreness he still felt from the "ministrations" of both girls, a small smile broke out onto his face at the sight of an old friend.

"What're you doing here, bushy brow?"

"I am here to assist you on your youthful endeavor, Naruto-kun!" the taijutsu user flashed a thumbs up when they finally reached him.

"Huh?" Naruto blinked. "Since when?"

"Tsunade-sama deemed that nine shinobi were not enough, and that three more were neccessary." Lee explained. "Gai-sensei and myself comprise the first two, but as for the third-

His words died away when he saw Tayuya.

"Oh?" He blinked those large orbs at the redead, seemingly oblivious to her ever-increasing ire. "Who is this? Might she be the one Sakura-chan told me about? Your...?" he made a pointed motion with his fingerstips, a gsture Naruto knew quite well. He didn't expect his youthfull ally to know that one.

"Depends on what she told you, shithead." Tayuya growled, anger evident.

Naruto felt himself flush.

"...guess you could say that."

There was a silence. Rock Lee stood there, a frown transfixed upon his youthful face.

"Oi?" Naruto waved a hand before his friend's face, his eyes closed face contorted in thoughtful confusion. "Lee? Earth to Lee?"

"I can see that you are all in the springtime of your_...YOUTH!"_ Lee shouted, opening his eyes and declaring the words with such force, that the trio actually jumped backwards. "To honor your Youthfulness, I will run four hundred laps around the village in the next two minutes before our mission! If I cannot do that, I will do five thousand push-ups with my hands tied together! And if I cannot do that, I will do sixty thousand laps around the planet on my hands while blindfolded! And if I cannot do _that_, I will—"

"Okay, we get the point! We really do! Please stop that now!" Naruto begged him while he was in mid-tirade. He was half-afraid that his fellow rookie would actually _do_ those things if he let him continue. Where in the hell was everyone else?!

"Well," a familiar voice interjected, "this is new. You're actually early for once, gaki?"

"Ero-senin?!"

Sure enough the Toad Hermit himself had arrived.

Within the hour the others arrived, trickling in one by one, sometimes in pairs. It wasn't long before the entire group had gathered. Sakura's disbelieving stare bored into his back like a drill, he could practically _taste_ all the pinkette's emotions thanks to Isobu's telempathy. He could sense her shock clear as day, her disbelief...and just a touch of sorrow? He shook it off without a thought, having reconciled her lack of feelings for him. It wasn't any of her damned business what he did with his free time. Or his recent love life, for that matter. Strange though, why did he get the same sensation from Hinata...

_'It seems you've got an admirer_.' Isobu offered from within his mind.

'What?'

'Oh nothing...

Returning

Everyone else regarded him with varying looks of confusion, or in Shizune and Guren's case subtle amusement. That made him more than a touch nervurous. The blond swiftly shut himself off from those feelings before his curiosity got the better of him. Best not to pry. Becoming aware of the inreased attention, Tayuya and Isobu disentangled themselves from him, but not before Might Guy got a word in edgewise. Actually, more than a few. Way more.

"YOSH, KAKASHI!" he declared, his outburst butting Lee's to shame. "I see your student is exceptionally youthful today! As expected from my rival! But Lee will not lose! Isn't that right, Lee?!

"Yessir!

Everyone sweatdropped...

_Oi oi oi..._

Clearing his throat, Shikamaru finally spoke up.

"Seems like everyone's here..." his gaze roamed all those assembled. "You already know our mission...

Naruto barely even registered those words. His mind was already on the future...

* * *

><p>The air grew progressively damp as they trekked northward, becoming more and more muggy, the earth spongy as they neared their destination. The countryside gave way to vast, open plains, before the latter finally succumbed to the dense foliage of Waterfall Country. No conversation was attempted, though Naruto could hear his mentor scribbling incessantly in that infernal notebook of his. Taking notes, no doubt! Between them, he secretly suspected the sanin had something to do with the foisting of Tayuya on him, but with no proof, he could only stare at the pervy sage. And the irony of it all...he was actually grateful.<p>

"What?" Jiraiya caught him staring and decided to make a point of it.

"Nothing." the blond suppressed a small smile. "Nothing at all."

_Go away._

Naruto was suddenly all too aware of the hair sticking up on his neck with every breath, and not just because of the tension. _Go away. Leave me alone._ Did anyone else hear these voices? They rose now in the backs of his mind, a littany of endless words, a cacophony of voices badgering down at his concsiousness, threatening to overwhelm him.

_Go away go way go away go way GO AWAY-_

A hand closed around his wrist, and abruptly, the voices were gone.

Kamehime stared back at him gravelly, her single eyes narrowed.

"We're getting close." was all she would say. "Be on your guard."

Naruto gulped, trying not to show just how affected he was by the prospect of facing a biju more than twice Isobu's strength.

"Sure, Its not as if-

_"Heads up!"_

Scarce had someone spoken than a shadow fell over them. A great, hulking shadow. Pursued by a loathsome chakra, comparible to the Kyuubi's. Its prescence lingered in the air like a foul odor, leaving the air rich with a strange musk. There was time for only this sensation and this sensation alone and then it was past, hurtling over their heads and into the distance. For a moment, they dared to hope it hadn't seen then. An explosion of sound shattered those fragile hopes like glass; just as the beast came hurtling back in their direction, gouging out a huge section of the forest.

Yamato gawped at the clearing in which the massive creature had landed.

"Already?"

Kakashi turned his head toward the sound, lone eye narrowing.

"There's no mistaking it...

Kamehime nodded, all business.

_"The Nanabi."_

**A/N: And there we have it. Shits about to get real, in more ways than one. Everyone versus Choumei next chapter! But is Fuu alive or not?! You'll have to let me know in your reviews! We see that a major difference has occurred since the month timeskip last chapter; thanks to Isobu and Jiraiya, Naruto is beginning to show genuine interest in women. But who else could he possibly be even remotely interested in? I've already hinted at Shizune and Guren, and we already know Isobu and Tayuya, but who else? To be perfectly honest, I'm not quite sure about putting Hinata in the pairing this time. And definitly not Sakura. She just wouldn't fit. But the battle begins next chapter!**

**So...in the immortal words of Atlas...**

**...Review...Would Ya Kindly? And of course, enjoy the preview!**

**(Preview)**

_"Hiden: Rinpungakure no Jutsu!"_

_Naruto flung an arm before his face as a blinding light burst before his retina, just in time to see the massive shape of the Nanabi hurtling towards him._

_If that thing hit the forest..._

_Naruto flung his hands forward and hoped for the best. They met the creature's horn and clamped down. Hard. The earth burst beneath them; cratering by the forces warring against and within. The blonde was barely immediately shaken. He felt the host's memories, trickling up through the blackness of her misery. A misery that had allowed the Nanabi too much control over her life; just as it ruled over her now. __Whomever this girl was, she was so utterly consumed by despair that he didn't know what to make of her. She was lost to herself. Truly, utterly, hopelessly lost. And still tthe struggled to maintain his grip. Still his struggle , pushing feet_

_Naruto took his rage and turned it outward._

_"Yield!" He demanded, claws of chakra closing around the Nanabi's throat, wresting it down. Dislodged from its camoflauge, the beast pitched backward with a squeal. Naruto leapt after it, eyes narrowed into bloody slits, hands curled into vicious claws. They closed around her tail and pulled. Not gently. Shrieking its fury, the kabutomushi spread its massive wingspan six wings in all, and beat at the ground, summoning a mighty gust as it took to the skies._

_Naruto raised his hands and brought them down._

_The sheer might of the attack acted like a giant fly-swatter. Struck from the sky, the Seven-Tailed beetle sank like a stone and careened into the ground._

_The jaws of the Nanabi clacked open with a soft click._

_A sonorous roar built at the back of its throat, swelling into an overwhelming tide of black and white._

_Naruto had only an instant to comprehend it before the Bijudama blew up in his face._

_The strange sphere roared forward and tore against Naruto's body. The attack had been too close for him to block, much less avoid; he had no choice but to retaliate with one of his own, lest he take the impact directly to his chest. There was an explosion, massive in size and scale. Both boy and biju flew back in agony as the dark wave ripped at them, their faces and chest, their skin burning away from his flesh. The blast seemed to last for eons before blowing past as gravity took over, their body spiraling towards the ground limply._

_And in that instant, he saw something._

_"Sonuva-_

* * *

><p><em>Choumei and Isobu couldn't have been more different in human form.<em>

_Whereas Isobu was short and curvy Choumei was tall; almost slender in appearance. Both her eyes were visible, each possibly the most startling shade of safrron Naruto had ever seen. Her skin was a beautiful bronze, as though she'd spent years in the warm climate of Kumogakure and not the jungles of Takigakure. Six wings buffeted the air behind her, complimenting the single tail at her back. A crown-like headpiece adjourned her forehead, a silent hearkening back to the royal "we" with which she spoke._

_"Onee-sama, if you'd just listen to master-_

_Chomei bared her fangs in a feral hiss._

_"He is not our master! No one is our master! Not him! Not the Akatsuki! Not anyone!"_

** R&R! =D**


	7. Of Tears and Turtles

**A/N: I return once again! As I'm sure you've all noticed, I've been on one helluva updating spree as of late, let my imagination run wild as I see fit. Originally, I had intented to update this story much sooner, but my computer crashed and I lost EVERYTHING. Thus, I was forced to recreate this chapter from scratch as well as several others. My only regret is that I wasn't able to get it to ya'll sooner. But I'm proud to present it! So, without further adue, I present you with...**

**...THE NEXT CHAPTER OF FOXES AND TURTLES! Sorry for the long wait!**

_"All according to plan..."_

_~?!_

**Of Tears and Turtles**

_"Oh sh-_

Uzumaki Naruto never did get to finish that sentence. Not as the Nanabi ripped through the clearing. There was no time for thought nor sentence, no time in which they might somehow produce a viable strategy against this massive monstrosity of chakra. One moment it had been nothing more than an imagined shadow flitting overhead. A distant thought that they'd plan against later while they made camp. The next; it was there-very alive, very real, ver present...

And very, _very_ angry.

**_...away!"_**

The voice was suddenly everywhere in his head, blaring in his brain, blotting out everyone, everything, every thought. _Tayuya. Kakashi. Shikamaru. Yamato. Shizune. Guren. Sakura. Hinata. Lee. Gai. Jiraiya_. All of their names flittered through his head for but a mere moment before he was lost in a sursurus of shouts and screams, more powerful than ever before. It was as if a thousand voices were shouting at him simultaneously with only one intention, one purpose, one command:

**__"Go away go way go away go way GO AWAY!"__**

_'Focus!'_ Kamehime was suddenly there like a lifeline, wrenching him out of the fog that muddled his mind. And not a moment too soon. It swept past with a shriek, sending the group scattering to evade its deadly horn and lashing tail.

"Yosh!" Lee cried! "Defeating this beast will be a most youthful challenge!"

"Indeed, my young pupil!" Gai seconded, flicking his former protege a thumbs up. "Lee, if we cannot seal this menace-then we shall run five thousand laps around Konoha upon our turn!" Naruto very nearly facepalmed at their exuberance in the face of such a threat. Well, at leas they weren't doing that damned sunset genjutsu of theirs...oh god. _They were._

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!

"GAI-SENSEI~!"

"LEE~!"

_"NOW IS NOT THE TIME!" _Jiraiya hollered!

Guren shuddered. "Do they always do that...?"

"Well," Kakashi shrugged, "You get used to it after a while."

Despite the brief moment of levity, the fact remained that they had a very large and very irritated beetle bearing down on them. One they couldn't see, only hear.

"Scatter!"

Shikamaru barked out a command, the words all but unintelligible over the incessant droning of the beetle's beating wings. Even from here across the clearing he could see his old friend weaving signs; and he balked at what Shika was trying to do. Did he really think he could restrain a biju through shadow possesssion alone? Incrediby he did just that, his shadow swiftly linking up with the swooping creature and actually halted it for a tenth of a second. Tayuya laughed.

"Not bad, lazybones!"

"Hurry up, damnit!" the Nara roared! "I can't hold it for very long!"

"Alright, alright," she sighed, raising the flute to her lips. "Don't get yer panties in a twist."

She lowered her head in acquiesce, knowing that would be no advising the man. He was far too focused on the task at hand…and she was a stubborn girl. So without further ado, Tayuya retrieved her flute from its worn pouch, laid her lips upon it, and began to play.

Naruto never heard the melody over the din, but whatever it was, the genjutsu was more than enough to ruputure the beast's camoflauge thanks to Hinata's pinpointing. Shikamaru dropped his shadow possession with a gasp, causing the beast to shriek in triumph-

-until Gai moved in, shooting upward like a rocket. Lee was only seconds behind. Naruto could only guess at the number of gates they'd unlocked, but whatever number, it proved more than adequate to send the tailed beast crashing down to the like a star to earth the beast began to beat its wings almost immeidately, trying to secure a quick takeoff in spite of the forces harrassing it-

Yamato was suddenly there to assist, great blocks of interlocking wood shot up like weeds, entrapping the beast's wings. Guren raised towering spires of crystal to encumber it further still, forcing it to the earth. Jiraiya even dropped one of his massive summons down on the beetle to ensure it didn't rise again. Just like that, it was over. Naruto almost couldn't believe it. Kamehime remained oddly silent in his mind, electing not to say her part and refusing to materalize-no sage wisdom was offered in the wake of their victory.

"Well, that was...anticlimactic." Kakashi muttered.

"So...now what?" Sakura was the second to recover her voice.

Shizune rolled up a sleeve.

"Now we move in and seal-

_**"WE WILL NOT BE TAKEN!"**_

Naruto gasped at the sheer force of the mental assault behind the cry and doubled overs, a trickle of blood running down his nose. With an almost audible twang of a sound the beast _roared;_ crushing the confines of its prison as though they were made of glass, shattering their brief semblance of their control. Too late the group remembered just how impossibly strong the tailed beast truly was; already more than twice the strength of the Three Tails and clearly thrice as violent.

"Oh hell," Jiraiya swore. "She's gonna get-

And then all hell broke loose.

In Naruto's mind, he heard the technique before it came to life.

_"Hiden: Rinpungakure no Jutsu!"_

Naruto flung an arm before his face as a blinding light burst before his retina his vision clearing just in time to see the massive shape of the Nanabi shooting into the sky and furiously hurtling towards them yet _again_ its horn lowered with obvious intent to do more than simply sweep past. No time to think. Only react.

If that thing hit the forest...

Naruto lunged forward and thrust Kakashi out of the way, flung his hands outward, wrapped himself in the Sanbi's chakra shroud, and hoped for the best. Bad idea. Horrible idea. But how was he to know it would result in utter catastrophe?

Unthinkingly, he met the creature's horns and clamped down with both hand. _Hard._ The earth burst beneath them; cratering by the forces warring against and within. That was when he felt it.

_**Why?**_

Blinking, he tried to shake it off. But it came on again, stronger than before.

**_Why do they hate me? Why why why why whywhywhywhwywhywhwy..._**

The blond was immediately shaken by what he found there. He felt the host's memories as though they were his own, trickling up through the blackness of her misery. A misery that had allowed the Nanabi too much control over her life; just as it ruled over her now. Whomever this girl was, she was so utterly consumed by despair that he didn't know what to make of her anymore. She was lost to herself. Truly, utterly, hopelessly lost. And still he struggled to maintain his grip. Still he struggled, despite pushing feet against the ground, digging deep furrows into the earth.

Naruto took his rage and turned it outward.

"Knock it off, damnit!" He demanded, claws of chakra closing around the Nanabi's throat, wresting it down. Dislodged from its camoflauge the beast pitched backward with a squeal. Naruto leapt after it-eyes narrowed into bloody slits, hands curled into vicious claws. They closed around her tail and pulled. Not gently. Shrieking its fury, the kabutomushi spread its massive wingspan six wings in all, and beat at the ground, summoning a mighty gust as it tried to take to the skies.

Naruto raised his hands, still clutching the Nanabi's tail, and brought them down with a mighty yank. It _screamed._

The sheer power of the attack acted like a giant fly-swatter. Struck from the sky, the Seven-Tailed beetle sank like a stone and careened into the ground, ploughing through the forest like a javelin hurtled from heaven to the earth below. He would've appreciated the symbolity had he not been so focused on putting the beast down. In a single bound, he leapt after it, landing squarely on Seven Tails chin. Almost immediately, the jaws of the Nanabi clacked open with a soft click. Naruto didn't like the sound of that. Not one bit.

A sonorous roar built at the back of its throat, swelling into an overwhelming tide of black and white.

_Oh._

**Crap.**

He had only an instant to comprehend it before the Bijudama blew up in his face.

The strange sphere roared forward and tore against Naruto's body. The attack had been too close for him to block, much less avoid; he had no choice but to retaliate with one of his own, lest he take the impact directly to his chest. There was an explosion, massive in size and scale. Both boy and biju flew back in agony as the dark wave ripped at them, their faces and chest, their skin burning away from his flesh. The blast seemed to last for eons before blowing past as gravity took over, their bodies spiraling towards the ground limply.

Grimacing at the already regenerating skin, on his chest and arms he managed to latch onto the beast again. It keened furiously at him.

_**"LEAVE US ALONE!"**_

And in that instant, he saw something.

"Sonuva-

Cold fury burned the world white.

* * *

><p>When his vision finally returned, the last Uzumaki found himself sitting in a sea of blackness. There was no light to speak of, only the inky void surrounding him. His eyes darted this way and that. For a terrifying instant he nearly panicked, almost yelped and cried out. But cooler heads prevailed and instead of freaking out as a green genine might he willed himself to be calm and closed his eyes for the peace that so eluded him. He was distressed. He needed to be calm. Cool. Collected. He wasn't alone. He'd never been alone. He had an ally here, in the dark.<p>

"I knew I picked the right person." When his eyes re-opened, Kamehime was standing across from him, arms crossed behind her back, smiling in the black. When she offered a hand he readily accepted, but not without noticing how the void seemed to shrink away from the two of them, creating a tiny patch of white in the sea of sorrow. She embraced him readily.

"Thank goodness you're alright. I thought I'd lost you in here."

Still in his state of shock, it took Naruto a moment to react and place his own arms around the thin waist of his tenant. He buried his face in her neck, enjoying the warmth of her pale skin on his cheeks and the smell of her hair in his nostrils. He felt her arms tighten around him and her breathing quickened, her breasts heaving up and down against his chest.

"Where is here, anyway?"

"Probably somewhere in the jinchuuriki's subconcsious." her lone eye left his as she pulled away, turning to roam the darkness. "What's left of it. You must've triggered something when you grabbed onto Choumei." The tone of her voice was unusually solemn. Stern, even. "We shouldn't be here. This is deeply personal for a jinchuuriki...I doubt our prescence here will be taken lightly."

Blue eyes roamed the black.

"Why?" a tiny voice-that of a little girl-asked of him. "Why do they hate me?"

Willing himself into calmness, the Uzumaki shook his head.

"Is she still alive?" he asked, following.

"That is...hard to say." she touched something in the dark, and they heard soft sobs. "Perhaps?" the biju shrugged. "If she is, then maybe-

**_"Leave."_ **A furious voice hissed at them from the nothingness. **_"You are like the girl. Weak. Frail. Fragile. Easily molded. You are not welcome here. We do not want you. We _reject_ you."_**

"We're not here to hurt you, sister."

_**"Lies."**_

A crackle of lightning lit the darkness and suddenly she stood before them in the light.

Choumei and Isobu couldn't have been more different in human form.

Whereas Isobu was short and curvy Choumei was tall; almost slender in appearance. Both her eyes were visible, each possibly the most startling shade of safrron Naruto had ever seen. Her skin was a beautiful bronze, as though she'd spent years in the warm climate of Kumogakure and not the jungles of Takigakure. Six wings buffeted the air behind her, complimenting the single tail at her back. A crown-like headpiece adjourned her forehead and sheltered her long, ebon hair, a silent hearkening back to the royal "we" with which she spoke.

"Onee-sama, if you'd just listen to master-

Chomei bared her fangs in a feral hiss. Perhaps she was just that. Feral. Unable to be controlled, unwilling, to listen.

**_"He is not our master! No one is our master! Not him! Not the Akatsuki! Not anyone!" _**her eyes locked on him, slitted and wild.** _"None! We would kill you before we allow ourselves to be controlled once more!"_**

"But-

_**"No more! He dies now!"**_

Her arm cut down mercilessly!

**A/N: And there we have it. Shits about to get real, in more ways than one. Everyone versus Choumei next chapter! But is Fuu alive or not?! You'll have to let me know in your reviews! We see that a major difference has occurred since the month timeskip last chapter; thanks to Isobu and Jiraiya, Naruto is beginning to show genuine interest in women. But who else could he possibly be even remotely interested in? I've already hinted at Shizune and Guren and we already know Isobu and Tayuya but who else? WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT CHAPTER?! We shall see! The battle will continue chapter!**

**So...in the immortal words of Atlas...**

**...Review...Would Ya Kindly? And of course, enjoy the preview! Shit's about to hit the fan, folks!**

**(Preview)**

_Naruto sputtered in surprise, gawping down at the severed stump that had once been his right hand. His mind refused to comprehend the sudden loss of his limb, instea gawping at the spurting wrist. When the strange black rod lashed out again, he only barely dodged aside, shivering as its cold edge grazed his shoulder._

_He found himself staring at deep rimmed violet eyes, set in a pale face adourned with black piercings and orange hair. When the stranger spoke, his voice evoked a subtle shudder of dread._

_"You'll be coming with us, Uzumaki Naruto."_

** R&R! =D**


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